|
Voila pourquoi Des celibataires pleins de ressources existe.... 27/4/2017
Le juge demande :
- Dites-moi, madame Martin, pourquoi demandez-vous le
divorce ?
- Mon mari me traite comme un , monsieur le juge !
- Ah ? Il vous maltraite ? Il vous empêche de sortir ?
- Non. Il voudrait que je sois fidèle!
3 Commentaires, 18 Consultations,
3 Votes
,4.90 Score
|
|
Blagounette 24/4/2016
C'est un couple de paysans qui participe a la remise
des prix d'un concours de taureaux. Le présentateur annonce : Troisième prix, le taureau Gédéon, trois ans, trois
saillies par jour ! La femme, tapant du coude son mari : T'entends ? trois fois par jour !! Tu devrais en prendre
de la graine ! Le présentateur continue : - Deuxième prix, le taureau Gérard, cinq ans, six saillies
par ...
1 Commentaires, 11 Consultations,
3 Votes
,4.90 Score
|
|
c'est du sport 8/10/2015
Trois amis discutent. L'un dit : - Moi j'ai 10 garçons ! L'autre dit : - Hey, si t'en fais un onzième tu auras une équipe
de foot... Le deuxième enchaîne : - Moi j'ai 14 garçons ! L'autre rétorque : - Mais si tu en faisais un 15ème tu aurais une équipe de
rugby ! Et le troisième dit: - Moi j'ai 17 filles ! L'autre enchaîne : - Si tu en faisais une 18ème tu pourrais faire un golf.
2 Commentaires, 15 Consultations,
7 Votes
,3.55 Score
|
|
Trois mecs 14/2/2014
C'est trois hommes qui discutent.
Au bout d'un moment l'un dit : Ma femme , mais elle conne , elle veut s'acheter une
voiture ! Elle a même pas le permis!
Sa c'est rien , je croit que la mienne est encore plus
conne réplique le deuxième , elle veut s'acheter
un avion , elle a même pas le brevet de pilotage.
Arrêter dit le troisième la mienne c'est le pompon
, ...
3 Commentaires, 40 Consultations,
8 Votes
,3.25 Score
|
|
Des femmes et des piscines 14/2/2014
Quelle est la différence entre une femme et une piscine
?
Aucune, elles te coûtent un fric monstre par rapport au
temps que tu passe dedans.
3 Commentaires, 25 Consultations,
4 Votes
,0.92 Score
|
|
elton john 31/5/2011
Cest quoi la différences enbtre elton
john et un oiseau ? Il n'y en pas les deux mangent des
graines  ...
2 Commentaires, 14 Consultations,
4 Votes
,0.53 Score
|
|
le cinema 28/3/2011
Deux bites vont au cinéma : - J'espère que ce n'est pas un film porno, sinon
on va encore passer la soirée debout.
10 Commentaires, 86 Consultations,
19 Votes
,3.65 Score
|
|
deux prostituées 28/3/2011
Deux prostituées dans un ascenseur : - Dis donc, tu ne trouves pas que ca sent le sperme ici ? - Ouais. Excuses-moi, j'ai rote.
4 Commentaires, 79 Consultations,
11 Votes
,1.86 Score
|
|
un mec et un ours 28/3/2011
Un mec voulait chasser l'ours. Il prend un fusil, mais
il le rate! Alors l'ours le chope et l'encule !
Effaré, le mec recommence, mais cette fois avec une mitrailleuse
! Et il le rate encore !!! De nouveau, l'ours encule
le mec ! Dégoûté, le mec prend carrément un bazooka
et juste avant qu'il tire, l'ours sort de sa caverne
et s'exclame : - Hé! tu ne serais pas zoophile sur les bords ?
5 Commentaires, 56 Consultations,
8 Votes
,3.71 Score
|
|
le et le mec 28/3/2011
Ça se passe tard le soir, dans une rue où il n'y a que
des maisons closes. Un se promène tranquillement,
et voit tout à coup un mec qui sort d'une maison en se
reboutonnant le pantalon. Le ne peut s'empêcher
de chanter : "Ohé ohé, je sais ce que t'as faieuhhhhhh
; ohé ohé, je sais ce que t'as fait !" Et le gosse
suit le mec. Ce dernier marche de plus en plus vite, mais
rien a faire, le ...
7 Commentaires, 62 Consultations,
8 Votes
,3.71 Score
|
|
le blanc et le noir 28/3/2011
Cela se passe dans une mission en Afrique. Dans ce village,
peuplé uniquement de noirs, se trouve un et un seul blanc
: le père Joseph. Un jour un des autochtones aborde le père
Joseph pour une plainte. - Écoute mon per'we, j'ai un petit p'obleme.
Ma femme vient d'avoi' un , et il est blanc.
Comme tu es le seul blanc dans la 'egion, je viens te
voi' pa'ceque je ne suis pas content. - Ah mon , ...
3 Commentaires, 55 Consultations,
7 Votes
,2.28 Score
|
|
visite medicale 28/3/2011
Un homme passe une visite médicale. Le docteur pose des
questions pour remplir le dossier : - Combien avez-vous d' ? - Treize ! Treize ? Avec la même ? - Oui, avec la même mais pas avec la même femme !
4 Commentaires, 42 Consultations,
5 Votes
,1.51 Score
|
|
le robinet qui fuit 28/3/2011
Un couple : - Chéri le robinet fuit ! change le joint - Pas le temps, et j'suis pas plombier ! Le lendemain : - Tu penses au robinet qui fuit ? - Pas ce soir et j'suis pas plombier ! Le jour suivent : - Tiens, le robinet ne fuit plus ? - Non le voisin est venu le réparer - Ah.. et il t'a demandé quoi pour le service ? - Que je lui fasse un gâteau ou une gâterie. - Ah.. et tu lui as fait quoi ...
2 Commentaires, 36 Consultations,
7 Votes
,3.30 Score
|
|
carte de credit 28/3/2011
C'est trois hommes qui vont dans une boîte de strip-tease.
Une vient danser devant eux. Le premier gars sort un billet de 10€ et lui met sur la fesse
droite. Le deuxième gars sort un billet de 20€ et lui colle sur
l'autre fesse. Le dernier prend sa carte de crédit et lui passe entre les
fesses.
2 Commentaires, 32 Consultations,
1 Votes
,2.40 Score
|
|
3 jeunes secretaires 28/3/2011
Trois jeunes secrétaires discutent à la pause des tours
qu'elles ont déjà joué à leur patron. - Moi, dit la première, j'ai découpé toutes les
photos dans son Play-boy, il n'a jamais trouvé qui
avait fait le coup... - Ha! Ha! Ha! Moi, dit la deuxième, il y a quinze jours, j'ai
trouvé des préservatifs dans son tiroir, et je les ai
tous percés avec une épingle... La troisième, elle, ...
4 Commentaires, 49 Consultations,
7 Votes
,3.30 Score
|
|
la migraine 28/3/2011
Un homme tend un verre d'aspirine à sa femme. - Mais je n'ai pas la migraine ! - Ah, alors on peut faire l'amour !
2 Commentaires, 24 Consultations,
0 Votes
|
|
une blague 28/3/2011
C'est Bernadette qui va prendre le thé chez Henriette.
Alors, elles papotent, elles mangent des petits gâteaux.
Puis arrive le mari d'Henriette avec un joli bouquet
de fleur. - Booonjour, chérie. - Bonjour ! Sur ce, le mari monte à l'étage. Henriette tire une
gueule pas possible et Bernadette, étonnée : - Mais pourquoi tu n'es pas contente ? Moi, mon mari,
il m'offre jamais de fleurs. - ...
0 Commentaires, 25 Consultations,
0 Votes
|
|
extra income 14/12/2010
A husband and wife were having difficulty surviving financially
so they decided that the wife should try as
an extra source of income. The husband drove her out to a
popular corner and informed her he would be at the side of
the building if she had any questions or problems.
A gentleman pulled up shortly after and asked her how much
to go all the way. She told him to wait a minute and ...
1 Commentaires, 19 Consultations,
3 Votes
,3.92 Score
|
|
difference entre reellement et potentiellement 8/7/2010
- Papa, c'est quoi la différence entre Potentiellement
et Réellement ? - Demande à ta mère si elle veut coucher avec Robert Redford
pour un million de dollars. Ensuite demande à ta soeur si
elle veut coucher avec Brad Pitt pour un million de dollars
et demande aussi à ton frère s'il veut coucher avec
Tom Cruise pour un million de dollars... Tu verras bien.
Le kid demande alors à sa mère: ...
6 Commentaires, 82 Consultations,
11 Votes
,5.04 Score
|
|
xD 22/11/2009
C'est une qui dit à sa mère : - Maman, je suis enceinte - Mais ma , où avais-tu la tête ? - Dans le pare brise !
si vous avez d'autres blagues, faites-en profitez
tout le monde !
0 Commentaires, 27 Consultations,
4 Votes
,2.47 Score
|
|
xxDD 27/10/2009
C'est un homme qui rentre chez lui et dit a sa femme :
"Chérie, prépare tes affaires, je viens de gagner
40 briques au loto!"
Et la femme toute excitée: "Mes affaires d'été ou d'hiver?"
"Toutes tes affaires , tu te casses!"
1 Commentaires, 60 Consultations,
8 Votes
,2.55 Score
|
|
Femme & tempête 27/10/2009
Quel est le point commun entre une femme et une tempête ?
- Elles arrivent toutes les deux chaudes et humides et partent
toutes les deux avec la voiture et la maison.
0 Commentaires, 53 Consultations,
4 Votes
,4.80 Score
|
|
xD 27/10/2009
Qu'ont en commun un homme et un avion ?
- Pour les deux, c'est la queue qui dirige.
0 Commentaires, 14 Consultations,
3 Votes
,2.45 Score
|
|
Un couple 1/5/2009
Un couple : - Chéri le robinet fuit ! change le joint - Pas
le temps, et j'suis pas plombier !Le lendemain :- Tu
penses au robinet qui fuit ?- Pas ce soir et j'suis pas
plombier !Le jour suivent :- Tiens, le robinet ne fuit plus
? - Non le voisin est venu le réparer - Ah.. et il t'a demandé
quoi pour le service ? - Que je lui fasse un gâteau ou une gâterie..
- Ah.. et tu lui as fait quoi ? - ...
0 Commentaires, 61 Consultations,
7 Votes
,5.08 Score
|
|
En matière de xxx 28/2/2009
En matière de sexe, la plupart des hommes se
prennent pour des dieux. Manque de pot, en matière de sexe,
la plupart des femmes sont athées. ...
0 Commentaires, 28 Consultations,
8 Votes
,5.33 Score
|
|
Prix 28/2/2009
Le sexe est le prix que les femmes paient pour
se marier. Le mariage est le prix que les hommes paient pour
avoir du sexe....
4 Commentaires, 45 Consultations,
10 Votes
,5.18 Score
|
|
Jalousie 18/2/2009
Deux p'tits bébés jumeaux jaloux l'un de l'autre,
un de ces gosses pensait de tuer son frêre, il lui a mis du
poison au mamelons de sa maman. Le lendemain ils trouvaient le pére empoisonné :d
0 Commentaires, 41 Consultations,
1 Votes
,2.40 Score
|
|
Humour!! 2/2/2009
Quelle est la différence entre une barrière et une femme????
A la barrière tu n'as pas besoin de lui dire je t'aime
pour la sauter....
2 Commentaires, 63 Consultations,
6 Votes
,3.65 Score
|
|
Blague libertine 13/11/2008
C'est un couple de paysans qui participe a la remise
des prix d'un concours de taureaux. Le présentateur annonce : Troisième prix, le taureau Gédéon, trois ans, trois saillies
par jour ! La femme, tapant du coude son mari : T'entends ? trois fois par jour !! Tu devrais en prendre
de la graine ! Le présentateur continue : - Deuxième prix, le taureau Gérard, cinq ans, six saillies
par jour ! ...
4 Commentaires, 88 Consultations,
13 Votes
,6.50 Score
|
|
la communication est la clé!!mais, avant passe le sexe!!! 5/10/2008
 Construre une relation c'est
tout d'abord avoiR une trés grande confiance en L'autre!!!UNe
bonne communication n'est pas juste parle.Mais,
l'amour est une autre chose de plus intense que le fait
de se regarder dans les yeux, un petit sourire ou une caressse!!!L'amour
c'est tout et rien....C'est pour sa qu'il
y a le sexe!!!!une communication PUR et Simple!!!...
0 Commentaires, 38 Consultations,
1 Votes
,2.40 Score
|
|
EDF 19/9/2008
Un jeune mari rentre le soir chez lui, et sa femme lui saute
au cou en lui disant: "Chéri, j'ai une grande nouvelle ! Je suis en
retard d'un mois... Je crois que nous allons avoir un bébé ! J'ai fait le
test chez le medecin aujourd'hui, mais tant qu'on
aura pas de certitude, on n'en parle à personne."
Le jour suivant, un controleur EDF sonne chez elle car ils
n'ont pas payé leur dernière ...
3 Commentaires, 113 Consultations,
16 Votes
,3.27 Score
|
|
Spécialiste 19/9/2008
C'est un couple qui essaye désespérément d'avoir
un . Ils ont consulté les plus grands spécialistes,
fait toutes les analyses, essayé toutes les méthodes...
en vain. Jusqu'au jour où ils entendent parler d'un super
professeur américain qui réussit parait il des miracles.
Voilà donc notre couple parti aux USA, pour rencontrer
le professeur. Ils obtiennent une consultation, et le jour ...
3 Commentaires, 77 Consultations,
10 Votes
,3.78 Score
|
|
Canards 19/9/2008
C'est une fois trois gars qui s'en vont au paradis
et doivent se trouver une avec qui passer le restant
de leurs jours. Alors, Dieu leur dit : - Pour avoir une belle , vous devez sauter toutes les
barrières sans marcher sur un canard. Sinon, vous vous retrouverez avec une laideur. Le premier essaye et marche sur un canard, il se retrouve
donc avec une monstrueuse créature. Le deuxième aussi ...
0 Commentaires, 79 Consultations,
13 Votes
,3.81 Score
|
|
Médicament 18/9/2008
Un brave garçon est venu faire la connaissance des parents
de sa fiancée. Le repas touche à sa fin lorsque la jeune
se plaint de migraine. Le jeune homme l’accompagne jusqu’à
sa chambre… et ne redescend qu’une heure plus tard. Le papa
de la jeune lit son journal dans le salon. En voyant
revenir le fiancé, il s’informe : - Vous êtes resté bien longtemps ...
0 Commentaires, 96 Consultations,
12 Votes
,3.86 Score
|
|
Blague 18/9/2008
Jacob qui habite Tel Aviv téléphone à son Samuel qui
a émigré à N.Y. et lui dit: -Je regrette de te gâcher ta journée, mais je dois t'informer
que ta mère et moi sommes en train de divorcer. Quarante
cinq ans de souffrance c'est bon. -Papa, comment peux tu dire ça ??? Et juste avant les fêtes
!!!! Lui cria le . -Nous ne pouvons plus nous voir, répondit le père, nous
sommes ...
0 Commentaires, 47 Consultations,
8 Votes
,3.71 Score
|
|
Une soirée d'enfer... 14/5/2008
Dans un bar archi bondé, le diable en personne fait son entrée.
C'est la panoique générale. Certains se sauvent
par la porte, d'autres par les fenêtres, bref en 3 secondes
le bar est vide. Reste au comptoir un type devant sa bière. Le diable s'approche du type toujours impassible
et lui dit : "- Tu sais qui je suis ?" "- Oui, vous êtes le diable". "- Et tu n'as pas peur de moi ?" Le ...
0 Commentaires, 77 Consultations,
9 Votes
,1.50 Score
|
|
Vive le mariage 14/5/2008
Une femme se réveille en pleine nuit et s'aperçoit
que le lit est vide. Elle descend au rez de chaussé et trouve son mari assis dans
la cuisine, l'air abattu. "- Que fais-tu à 3h du matin assis sans la cuisine ?"
"- Tu te souviens, quand ton père nous a surpris à l'arrière
de ma voiture et que tu étais toute nue ? " "- Oui, je me souviens" "- Tu étais mineure" "- En effet, et alors ?" "- ...
0 Commentaires, 78 Consultations,
7 Votes
,2.79 Score
|
|
Dans les vestiaires... 9/5/2008
Après un bon match de basket amateur, disputé dans une bonne
ambiance, les deux équipes se douchent ensemble pour continuer
à discuter. L'un des joueurs, un grand noir, remarque un tatouage
sur le sexe d'un gars de l'équipe adverse, européen,
et déchiffre "V" "E".
-VE? ça veut dire quoi? demande t'il au gars. -En fait là c'est parce que je suis au repos, mais en
action on peut ...
3 Commentaires, 93 Consultations,
7 Votes
,2.79 Score
|
|
speciale 29/1/2008
quelle est la difference entre un homme et un pruneau?
aucune
tu les suces la veille au soir et ils commencent déjà à te
faire chier le lendemain matin
1 Commentaires, 61 Consultations,
9 Votes
,2.36 Score
|
|
quelle est la différence 12/12/2007
quelle est la différence entre une , une salope, et
une emmerdeuse? la différence est la si ont la paie tous le monde couche avec la salope tous le monde couche avec sauf toi l'emmerdeuse personne ne couche avec sauf toi
2 Commentaires, 58 Consultations,
13 Votes
|
|
nuit de noce 12/12/2007
un jeune garçon qui doit se marie bientôt commence à avoir
peur car il na jamais touché de de sa vie. il va voir son père et il lui demande comment sa ce passe la
nuit de noce, sont père lui répond une fois dans le lit tu
devra l'embrassé, la caressé, et ensuite introduire
ton sexe et lui faire l'amour. mais le garçon dit a son père mais comment, et son père lui
répond va haut bout ...
2 Commentaires, 83 Consultations,
10 Votes
,1.59 Score
|
|
Les bienfaits du sexe 3/12/2007
1. Le sexe est un beau traitement. Des tests scientifiques
prouvent que lorsqu'une femme fait l'amour,
elle produit un certain degré d'hormones estrogène,
ce qui lui donne des cheveux luisants et une peau douce.
2. Faire l'amour doucement et tendrement réduit les
problèmes de peau, les démangeaisons et grains de beauté.
La sueur produite nettoie les pores et rend votre peau ...
1 Commentaires, 82 Consultations,
13 Votes
,6.67 Score
|
|
Après une soirée 4/6/2006
Après une soirée, un gars ramène sa copine chez elle, à 3h
du matin, dans un quartier très huppé. Ils sont à la veille
de s'embrasser pour se dire bonne nuit devant la porte
d'entrée, lorsque le gars commence à se sentirexcité
sexuellement..
Avec un air confiant, il se penche vers elle en souriant, une
main accolée sur le mur (très importantpour la suite de
l'histoire ...
3 Commentaires, 432 Consultations,
39 Votes
,8.37 Score
|
|
blondes je vous aime 13/5/2006
C'est une blonde qui entre dans un sex shop pour s'acheter
des godesmichets. Elle interpèle le vendeur et lui dit:
"je voudrais le bleu, le vert et le rouge s'il
vous plait".
Et la le vendeur lui répond: "pour les deux premiers
pas de probleme mais pour l'extincteur il faut que
je demande a mon patron"
1 Commentaires, 284 Consultations,
25 Votes
,5.23 Score
|
|
a votre service mesdemoiselles :) 13/5/2006
- Tu sais ce qu'elle dit une quand elle voit une
grosse bite ?
- Non !
- Et bien moi je sais !
2 Commentaires, 209 Consultations,
14 Votes
,2.82 Score
|
|
jamais facile d'évaluer les dimensions 13/5/2006
Ah.. oui.! continue... oohh... chéri...
- C'est bon hein...
- Oooh oui... mais enlève ta bague elle me fait mal !!
- C'est pas ma bague c'est ma montre...
1 Commentaires, 235 Consultations,
14 Votes
,0.74 Score
|
|
dialogue a l'intérieur 13/5/2006
- Deux spermatozoides se rencontrent. Le premier demande
à l'autre :
- Eh c'est encore loin ?
Le deuxième lui repond :
- Ben oui on n'est encore qu'aux amygdales !
0 Commentaires, 61 Consultations,
4 Votes
,0.92 Score
|
|
les blondes me feront toujours rire 13/5/2006
- Une blonde entre dans une pharmacie pour acheter des preservatif.
La vendeuse lui demande quelle taille , la femme ouvre la
bouche le plus qrand possible et dit :
- comme ca .
1 Commentaires, 201 Consultations,
20 Votes
,5.55 Score
|
|
merci père noël 13/5/2006
C'est Polo qui rentre chez lui à 3 heure du matin le soir
de noël , complétement ivre.
Chemin faisant, Polo rencontre le père noël :
-bonsoir père noël, dit moi, tu pourrai me faire un cadeau
père noël ?
-mais bien sûr Polo, qu'est-ce que tu voudrai ?
-tout ce que je veut ?
-tout !
-ben, 1, non 10 milliards d'euros sur mon compte en
banque, tu peut le faire ça, ...
0 Commentaires, 108 Consultations,
7 Votes
,4.31 Score
|
|
?! 2/4/2006
C'est une qui dit à sa mère :
- Maman, je suis enceinte
- Mais ma , où avais-tu la tête ?
- Dans le pare brise !...
0 Commentaires, 175 Consultations,
4 Votes
,3.25 Score
|
|
Cours du soir... 2/4/2006
Deux ouvriers prennent leur pause de midi, le premier fait
:
- Tu connais Victor Hugo ?
- Non.
- T'as tort, tu devrais suivre les cours du soir !
Le lendemain, toujours le même :
- Tu connais Albert Einstein ?
- Non.
- T'as tort, tu devrais suivre les cours du soir !
Le surlendemain, ça recommence :
- Tu connais Karl Marx ?
- Non
- T'as tort, tu devrais suivre ...
0 Commentaires, 461 Consultations,
26 Votes
,4.43 Score
|
|
c l'histoire d'1 courgette, d'une banane et d'une b**..... 2/4/2006
C'est l'histoire d'une courgette , d'une
banane et d'une b**. La courgette dit :
- Moi, on m'épluche et on me jette à la poubelle.
La banane lui répond :
- T'as de la chance , moi , on m'épluche et on me mange.
Et la b** dit :
- Vous ! Avez de la chance ! Moi on me met un sac poubelle sur
la tête , on me fout dans un trou noir et on me pompe jusqu'à
se que je d'égueule.[COLOR ...
0 Commentaires, 193 Consultations,
7 Votes
,3.55 Score
|
|
les désagréments d'une bonne pipe 13/1/2006
c'est 3 femmes qui parlent de leurs rapports avec leur
mari. la première dit :
- A chaque fois que je fais une pipe à Robert, il a les couilles
froides.
<br>
La deuxième : Avec René, c'est pareil, toutes les fois
où je lui fais une pipe, il a les couilles froides. Et toi
?
<br>
La troisième : ... ben moi j'ai jamais osé ! c'est
bien ?
<br>
OUI, oui ! ...
0 Commentaires, 493 Consultations,
36 Votes
,4.88 Score
|
|
Le ver, l'oiseau et le chat 1/12/2005
Un petit ver sur une branche regarde une pomme et va sur elle
pour la manger, et la un oiseau voie le ver et ce dit "je
vais attendre qu'il mange comme sa il sera plus grassouillet"
mais en dessous il y a une chatte qui a vue l oiseau et la chatte
ce dit la même chose "je vais attendre que le ver ai
manger et que l'oiseau mange le ver et moi je mange oiseau".
L'oiseau mange le ver, la ...
0 Commentaires, 133 Consultations,
17 Votes
,3.55 Score
|
|
Nos femmes nous trompent ! 30/5/2005
Deux super jeunes femmes ont décidé de sortir un soir pendant
que les maris regardent un match de foot à la télé.
Elles s'amusent beaucoup et forcent un peu sur la boisson...
Au retour, elles ont un besoin urgent de faire pipi. Passant
devant un cimetière, elles se disent que l' endroit
est tranquille
et se retrouvent derrière une tombe.
La première ...
5 Commentaires, 5675 Consultations,
517 Votes
,3.97 Score
|
|
Blow Job gone wrong 15/9/2021
As we are laying in bed. Me sucking his
cock him slamming the dildo into my pussy. We been at it for
20 plus minutes. I had already came 2 times. He wanted 3.
I raised my hips I was getting close he said ya suck it I
going to cum. I wrapped my lips around the head and went into
suction mode. He was pumping at my mouth when he jerked away
and Shot Cum straight ...
1 Commentaires, 28 Consultations,
1 Votes
,2.40 Score
|
|
Lol 14/3/2021
<br><br>
Ou
0 Commentaires, 5 Consultations,
0 Votes
|
|
Call Girls In Jaipur | High Profile Call Girls in Jaipur 30/1/2021
Dear friends, if you are interested in reading of article
then it is a most interesting article which I am going to
present and you will read the story of jaipur Call Girl on
this page just read an entire summary and also visit the
personal website-https://www.pinkcityescort.com/
so that you can read and see images just contact us.I am telling
a story related to call girl it is the most ...
0 Commentaires, 0 Consultations,
0 Votes
|
|
Top Ten Warning Signs that the Profile is a Fake 4/12/2020
One of my "kinks" these days is weeding out the
various fake profiles that pop up in Des celibataires pleins de ressources now and then. So,
from the home office in Ypsilanti, Michigan, here are the
Top Ten Warning Signs that the Profile is a Fake <br><br>
10. The writer spels and speaks english goodly . 9. Uses a photo of a woman who should be a model 8. Uses a photo of a woman who actually IS a model ...
2 Commentaires, 46 Consultations,
3 Votes
,1.47 Score
|
|
Anal 14/8/2020
Care share an anal experiences that have gone bad?
0 Commentaires, 23 Consultations,
0 Votes
|
|
Clean up on aisle 9, please 31/1/2020
I have a friend has granted me permission to share her
story. No, this is not code for me to be able to talk about
myself without you knowing it, but an actual friend. If
you’ve kept up with any of my blogs or writings, you know
my life is an open book, so there would be no need for me to
hide behind “a friend.” Let’s her “Grace.”
Anyway… Grace has come to a in her life where ...
0 Commentaires, 110 Consultations,
5 Votes
,3.47 Score
|
|
?? Why is ?? 30/1/2020
If we have 3somes all the times but I can’t at females!?!!
Lol
1 Commentaires, 8 Consultations,
0 Votes
|
|
The Sound of Incognito 28/1/2020
Hello incognito, my old friend I've come to do bad things again Stealth mode on while I'm creeping Releasing seeds if you catch my meaning And the visions that are planted in brain Still remain but not in web browser after I close out and delete all history
just in case <br><br>
In office I wasn't alone Nearly caught me on phone 'Neath desk fingers cramp And I think ...
2 Commentaires, 16 Consultations,
4 Votes
,2.47 Score
|
|
It's all about the points.... 26/1/2020
It's all about the ....It's all about the
....It's all about the ....It's
all about the ....It's all about the ....It's
all about the ....
2 Commentaires, 18 Consultations,
7 Votes
,3.30 Score
|
|
Mirror Mirror 19/1/2020
Jacqueline’s breath caught in her throat as Raef pulled
her tight his chest. With his arms wrapped tightly around
her, she looked into his eyes and saw them sparkle with the
reflection of the stars. His lips were soft against her
ear as he leaned down and whispered… <br><br>
Okay—Okay—I…I’m sorry. I just can't do this.
<br><br>
LOL! <br><br> ...
0 Commentaires, 51 Consultations,
7 Votes
,3.30 Score
|
|
Dinner is Served 8/1/2020
I had an odd (?) thought today, while masturbating. At least,
I think it may have been odd? I’m not sure. Here, I’ll
just tell you and you can make up your own mind. Cool? Let’s
proceed… Sex is kind of like a candle. When you first ignite the spark,
it’s hot and heavy. I mean, that shit is on! I’m thinking
most of us understand and have experienced aforementioned
hotness, so there’s ...
9 Commentaires, 131 Consultations,
30 Votes
,4.42 Score
|
|
points 5/1/2020
4 the points
1 Commentaires, 9 Consultations,
4 Votes
,2.47 Score
|
|
i am not funnin in a relationship 3/1/2020
Just need to get some Points so I am adding something here.
1 Commentaires, 14 Consultations,
9 Votes
,3.00 Score
|
|
Funny 3/1/2020
Funny more points
0 Commentaires, 12 Consultations,
6 Votes
,3.37 Score
|
|
Your Seat Can Also Be Used as a Flotation Device 1/1/2020
I was in my mid forties, contently married for 14 years and KNEW life was perfect! <br><br>
ME: Life is perfect! <br><br>
LIFE: Wanna bet? <br><br>
Details are not important... Him~ my sister~Our couch
in our house~Fucking~Done and divorced. <br><br>
What the fuck was I supposed to do now? OH, right! Date! <br><br>
I knew there was no ...
3 Commentaires, 115 Consultations,
20 Votes
,4.53 Score
|
|
Santa Porn 26/12/2019
"Ahh, now for the real life part, " Santa smiled,
as Brenda and Sally repositioned themselves. In real life,
when it's not porn for men to jack off to, Lesbian sex
is a far more beautiful thing and less of a spectator sport.
Sally laid back, and Brenda gently slipped her fingers
into Sally, turned her wrist just the way she knew, and started
the orgasm inducing fingering that worked ...
0 Commentaires, 32 Consultations,
18 Votes
,2.31 Score
|
|
Ahh youth 22/12/2019
So I like cumming on a womans tits or even her and of course
Im more in tune with the idea when the partner in question
wants it. Oh but what about a time when you lacked experience
and aim...Like hitting a womam right in the eye they they
are even near your . IE a shot arced back enough
land in her eye when we were laying side by side after lol
ahh youth
3 Commentaires, 41 Consultations,
19 Votes
,4.05 Score
|
|
No points! 20/12/2019
is not very funny. 
0 Commentaires, 1 Consultations,
0 Votes
|
|
points 17/12/2019
points
0 Commentaires, 5 Consultations,
4 Votes
,2.86 Score
|
|
Blowjob hickies 15/12/2019
I'm very partial receiving oral. Sometimes some
people get a little carried away and when I get home I notice
the head of dick is all bloodshot. I was telling friend
about this problem and he started calling them dickies.
Does anyone else run into this and what do you call it?
3 Commentaires, 42 Consultations,
27 Votes
,3.77 Score
|
|
Himor 15/12/2019
Where’s e him in relationshipscv
0 Commentaires, 4 Consultations,
4 Votes
,0.92 Score
|
|
How well do you know each other :) 13/12/2019
Son: Dad, I’ve heard that in some parts of the world a man
doesn’t know his wife he marries her. <br><br>
Father: Son, that’s true everywhere.
5 Commentaires, 40 Consultations,
18 Votes
,2.99 Score
|
|
bi 29/11/2019
to bi or not to bi , bye
2 Commentaires, 28 Consultations,
19 Votes
,1.67 Score
|
|
cock size 22/10/2019
I love in how are bigger than everything i see, Pictures
or ca m if you want
0 Commentaires, 2 Consultations,
1 Votes
,3.70 Score
|
|
I love white woman 20/10/2019
I prefer white woman, I love my black woman but I also love
white woman because they are more freakier.
8 Commentaires, 83 Consultations,
50 Votes
,2.62 Score
|
|
Funny 10/10/2019
If its easy take it twice
3 Commentaires, 68 Consultations,
55 Votes
,1.86 Score
|
|
In the family way 4/10/2019
This is the story of a young lawyer who always spent his summer
vacation at the same place by the sea. He always went to the
same boarding house because the daughter of the hotel looked
good enough to eat. Naturally, as the lawyer was handsome and with the summer
heat helping, the two young people quickly went from feelings
to actions. The next year, the lawyer found his sweetheart, and was ...
4 Commentaires, 125 Consultations,
55 Votes
,3.28 Score
|
|
Living by the three F's. 29/9/2019
If it floats, flys or fucks. Rent it don't buy it. Anyone
else live by this?
4 Commentaires, 55 Consultations,
45 Votes
,2.36 Score
|
|
Try to have fun 23/9/2019
Keep your woman happy n always eat her pussy before you fuck
her
6 Commentaires, 92 Consultations,
61 Votes
,3.94 Score
|
|
Free bonus 18/9/2019
I remember Des celibataires pleins de ressources use to give u credits or 40 day gold or something
6 Commentaires, 73 Consultations,
55 Votes
,2.73 Score
|
|
Anal sex 18/9/2019
Is it just me or is anyone else worried about being s#$T on
6 Commentaires, 45 Consultations,
25 Votes
,2.25 Score
|
|
Losing my virginity 18/9/2019
Lost it in a construction site with a girl in the front seat
of a backhoe. wild experience. a bit of my cum dripped out
her pussy onto the seat so someone is probably wondering
how that stain got there
0 Commentaires, 2 Consultations,
2 Votes
,3.12 Score
|
|
Losing my virginity 18/9/2019
Lost it in a construction site with a girl in the front seat
of a backhoe. wild experience. a bit of my cum dripped out
her pussy onto the seat so someone is probably wondering
how that stain got there
0 Commentaires, 4 Consultations,
2 Votes
,1.73 Score
|
|
points 17/9/2019
pts
0 Commentaires, 1 Consultations,
1 Votes
,5.00 Score
|
|
points 15/9/2019
points
1 Commentaires, 4 Consultations,
2 Votes
,3.81 Score
|
|
que TAN IMPORTANTE ES? 1/9/2019
el humor es una variable influyente en una relacion de pareja?
0 Commentaires, 0 Consultations,
0 Votes
|
|
fun is good 28/8/2019
Nigel and Stephen, are keen fishermen and wine drinkers;
here you can see a photo taken while they are enjoying some
night fishing while on holiday, with their wives, in Poitou-Charente,
France, last year. <br><br>
Slurping a large Bordeaux Supérieur, Nigel announces,
'I think I'm going to divorce my wife, she hasn't
spoken to me in eighteen months.' ...
4 Commentaires, 98 Consultations,
57 Votes
,2.56 Score
|
|
Blind Date 24/8/2019
I had a blind date once. A friend of mine asked take
his g/f's sister. I agreed. So I went her place
get her. When she opened the door she was 5ft tall and weighed
about 350lbs. I thought okay. So we went a nice restaurant.
After sitting down she looked at the menu intently. I thought
okay. Then she said can I pick what I want. I said sure. She
ordered 3 complete meals. The waiter ...
6 Commentaires, 122 Consultations,
54 Votes
,3.35 Score
|
|
Sense of humor 17/8/2019
relationships where both individuals don’t have a good
sense of humor never seem work. Understand you have
take you relationship serious but making each other laugh
and smile helps build and sustain a good relationship.
4 Commentaires, 43 Consultations,
26 Votes
,3.35 Score
|
|
booty 7/8/2019
o booty how I chase thee I only did this for my points yee I don't want to trespass I just want to fuck that ass good people i love you with that said throu
1 Commentaires, 30 Consultations,
25 Votes
,2.47 Score
|
|
Passing gas in the bedroom 31/7/2019
If you have a significant other or a friend with benefits
would it make you laugh if they were to pass gas while having
sex? Some people may find it gross but personally I enjoy
the embarrassment/ humor that comes from the unplanned
moment. Is it really that bad? It seems natural to me. What
do you think?
0 Commentaires, 0 Consultations,
0 Votes
|
|
points 27/6/2019
points points points points points points
0 Commentaires, 0 Consultations,
0 Votes
|
|
Peter at the gate. 21/6/2019
comes to gates of Heaven telling Peter about her
husband and their yard, Peter tells her you didn't
need a man , you needed a bull , you are a milking cow.
3 Commentaires, 67 Consultations,
35 Votes
,2.01 Score
|
|
points 19/6/2019
Points points points points points
0 Commentaires, 0 Consultations,
0 Votes
|
|
Loosen up 10/6/2019
Getting ready for a meet...loosen up. Remember your here
for fun. Although keeping our nerves in check is not easy.
So lighten up and have the most fun imaginable.
14 Commentaires, 138 Consultations,
86 Votes
,5.03 Score
|
|
points 8/6/2019
for points please ignore
0 Commentaires, 4 Consultations,
4 Votes
,3.63 Score
|
|
points 8/6/2019
for points please ignore
0 Commentaires, 2 Consultations,
2 Votes
,1.04 Score
|
|
I like 29/5/2019
I like to do it in public places, but of morbid people ho
like to look, to me as you can see in my photos, I love it...
7 Commentaires, 74 Consultations,
22 Votes
,1.57 Score
|
|
points 28/5/2019
doing for more points points points points
0 Commentaires, 1 Consultations,
1 Votes
,3.70 Score
|
|
Panty hose 16/5/2019
So I ducked this woman I met. See told me discrete, and she
really wanted it bad. Great i hit it hard, and fast, done
in record time. Then she tell me she was a virgin. I say, if
I knew you were a virgin, I would have taken my time with you.
She says, if I knew you were going to take your time, I would
have taken my panty hose off.
1 Commentaires, 56 Consultations,
36 Votes
,2.89 Score
|
|
anyone ever... 4/5/2019
slap a girls ass while your 69ing and then get the weird feeling
like a you just disturbed a bunch of poop particles that
are now falling down onto your face...probably not but
I swear i've felt dusting before and it really pulls
you out of the moment and makes you hesitant to slap that
ass again...
5 Commentaires, 59 Consultations,
42 Votes
,0.93 Score
|
|
points 27/4/2019
points points points points points
1 Commentaires, 16 Consultations,
10 Votes
,1.99 Score
|
|
points 26/4/2019
doing this for more points
0 Commentaires, 0 Consultations,
0 Votes
|
|
Said "No Thank You" 8/4/2019
One night, drinking at my friends, I decided to invite a
girl friend over to partake. As the night went on, and her
drooling over me, things started to die down and get quiet.
Just as the room got silent, my girl friend leaned over and
yelled "LET'S FUCK". Me being shy, politely
said "No thank you". The next week, the same
girl friend called me up and asked me if I would ...
5 Commentaires, 121 Consultations,
49 Votes
,3.57 Score
|
|
What's the funniest thing that's happened to you during sex? 7/4/2019
I once broke the bed right before climax.. went right through
it!
3 Commentaires, 70 Consultations,
38 Votes
,3.24 Score
|
|
here for the points 20/3/2019
points points points points points points points
0 Commentaires, 2 Consultations,
2 Votes
,1.04 Score
|
|
Points 17/2/2019
Just here for the points
12 Commentaires, 88 Consultations,
57 Votes
,4.96 Score
|
|
funny 13/2/2019
whats the funniest thing thats happened to you in public?
0 Commentaires, 40 Consultations,
25 Votes
,1.47 Score
|
|
discreet? 5/2/2019
funny when you meet someone, they say discreet, and then
get naked? mmmmmm
1 Commentaires, 32 Consultations,
23 Votes
,2.31 Score
|
|
mothers 9/1/2019
One afternoon a man came home from work to find total mayhem
in his house. His three children were outside, still in
their pajamas, playing in the mud, with empty food boxes
and wrappers strewn all around the front yard. <br><br>
The door of his wife’s car was open, as was the front door
to the house. Proceeding into the entry, he found an even
bigger mess. A lamp had been knocked ...
6 Commentaires, 130 Consultations,
49 Votes
,3.43 Score
|
|
mothers 9/1/2019
One afternoon a man came home from work to find total mayhem
in his house. His three children were outside, still in
their pajamas, playing in the mud, with empty food boxes
and wrappers strewn all around the front yard. <br><br>
The door of his wife’s car was open, as was the front door
to the house. Proceeding into the entry, he found an even
bigger mess. A lamp had been knocked ...
5 Commentaires, 78 Consultations,
37 Votes
,2.81 Score
|
|
meet you in heaven 9/1/2019
After a long illness, a woman died and arrived at the Gates
of Heaven. While she was waiting for Saint Peter to greet
her, she peeked through the Gates. She saw a beautiful banquet
table. Sitting all around were her parents and all the other
people she had loved and who had died before her. They saw
her and began calling greetings to her — “Hello”
“How are you! We’ve been waiting for ...
4 Commentaires, 83 Consultations,
31 Votes
,3.53 Score
|
|
meet you in heaven 9/1/2019
After a long illness, a woman died and arrived at the Gates
of Heaven. While she was waiting for Saint Peter to greet
her, she peeked through the Gates. She saw a beautiful banquet
table. Sitting all around were her parents and all the other
people she had loved and who had died before her. They saw
her and began calling greetings to her — “Hello”
“How are you! We’ve been waiting for ...
1 Commentaires, 45 Consultations,
23 Votes
,3.60 Score
|
|
sex 6/1/2019
https://www.healthywomen.org/content/article/understanding-your-sex-drive-when-one-you-wants-it-more?context=healthcenter/60&context_title=60&context_description=
1 Commentaires, 31 Consultations,
20 Votes
,0.70 Score
|
|
this story to make you laugh 29/12/2018
a lady goes to a restaurant , the waiter comes , and says ,
can I offer you a beer , she says no no. some wine ? no no , Whisky
?? no no. The waiter says , why ? does it make your legs tremble
? she says , they make me open them
1 Commentaires, 13 Consultations,
5 Votes
,3.80 Score
|
|
Looking for women that like younger guys 4/12/2018
If you like to chat message on here or six
0 Commentaires, 0 Consultations,
0 Votes
|
|
Looking for women that like younger guys 4/12/2018
If you like to chat message on here or six
0 Commentaires, 1 Consultations,
1 Votes
,3.70 Score
|
|
In a perfect world 27/11/2018
Orgies!
3 Commentaires, 45 Consultations,
34 Votes
,2.07 Score
|
|
the funniest thing you ever had happen while playing with a partner 21/11/2018
I would be interested in hearing from others as to the funniest
thing that has ever happened ..... in the moment..
6 Commentaires, 82 Consultations,
36 Votes
,3.76 Score
|
|
wtf 5/10/2018
for fun or not
4 Commentaires, 60 Consultations,
44 Votes
,3.46 Score
|
|
Joke about each other 25/8/2018
I like to joke about each other and call each other names
but be very respectful and also know your limit
3 Commentaires, 27 Consultations,
16 Votes
,4.16 Score
|
|
WOW won't believe this. 12/7/2018
Well I was married to a redheaded German, Irish, Indian
gal for over ten years. If I could write a book about those
years not sure how to put the book on the stands. Fact, fiction,
or your not going to believe this shit. The sex life I really
miss but if your old enough to remember the 16 ounce Pepsi
glass bottles that came in 8 packs I think she could hit a
fly off a fence post at about 50 yards ...
3 Commentaires, 107 Consultations,
58 Votes
,3.04 Score
|
|
Relationship Clichés: What They Really Mean 5/7/2018
 Regardless of who you date, no matter how long the relationship
lasts; chances are you’ll hear some (if not all) of these
favorites. Here’s what they really mean. <br><br>
“Sometimes the person you want the most is the person
you are best without.” I like you but we DO NOT get along. <br><br>
“Everything is going to be OK. Maybe not now or ...
13 Commentaires, 196 Consultations,
96 Votes
,5.15 Score
|
|
I am 52 years Bengali from kolkata do job a very simple man looking for a real friend if u like call 4/5/2018
I am 52 years Bengali from kolkata do job a very simple man
looking for a real friend if u like call me 9734 eight 52353I
am 52 years Bengali from kolkata do job a very simple man
looking for a real friend if u like call me 9734 eight 52353I
am 52 years Bengali from kolkata do job a very simple man
looking for a real friend if u like call me 9734 eight 52353I
am 52 years Bengali from kolkata ...
0 Commentaires, 51 Consultations,
41 Votes
,1.28 Score
|
|
Finishing First 2/5/2018
Who thinks that laughing should be part of sex? If you finish
first, why not clap your hands, cheer and say first  !
There is always room and time for a second round!
8 Commentaires, 64 Consultations,
38 Votes
,3.65 Score
|
|
seriously ,that is considered bisexual ? I am wondering. 18/4/2018
Bisexual seems like a simple term that is easy to understand.
But , is it really that simple to declare some a bisexual?
Does having participated in a 3 way with another of the same
sex make some a bisexual? Does intimate contact with the
same sex define the sexuality , or is it the intent of the parties involved. I get a lot of men that want to give
oral sex, but If I accept , am I now a ...
8 Commentaires, 126 Consultations,
43 Votes
,4.22 Score
|
|
Chewing (Dick) Gum 11/4/2018
I was very young at that time, still in my teens. I was dating
a girl and we agreed to a blowjob before moving onto actual
sex. She was giving me a nice head and I was enjoying thoroughly
as this was the first time I was receiving . She, at the
same time was chewing a gum. When she took out my dick from
her mouth there was this white substance on its head. She
was feeling apologetic that she had ...
4 Commentaires, 110 Consultations,
52 Votes
,3.35 Score
|
|
How many dick pics should i post 14/3/2018
What is the ratio regular pics to dic picks that I should
have ... like 3 regular pics to 1 dic pic or 3 dic pics to one
regular pic <br><br>
Also should I use my own dic ? Or a random dic on the internet
? Or a celebrity dic ? <br><br>
Just trying to get it right !
6 Commentaires, 65 Consultations,
37 Votes
,3.66 Score
|
|
funny 13/3/2018
According to new research, humor and laughter may be the
most effective way for men and women to initiate and develop
a relationship. Jeffrey Hall, an associate professor at the University
of Kansas, found that when two strangers meet, the more
times a man tries to be funny and the more a woman laughs at
those attempts, the more likely it is for the woman to be
interested in dating. Chances of ...
2 Commentaires, 14 Consultations,
11 Votes
,2.42 Score
|
|
My friend's antics with crab potion 3/2/2018
This is an old tale but still makes me laugh when I'm
reminded of it. <br><br>
We were in our 20's and enjoying life as young lads do,
including one drunken weekend of partying which included
sharing a girl who kindly thanked us with a dose of crabs.
<br><br>
Apparently, he knew his previous landlady had a bottle
of the cure and I drove him over to collect it. ...
4 Commentaires, 102 Consultations,
49 Votes
,4.11 Score
|
|
Read the label, its on there for a reason 25/1/2018
We see a couple that we met here on Des celibataires pleins de ressources, they are great people,
are a lot of fun and awesome friends who we have come to love,
trust and respect. Last month we were together for yet another
great evening of dinning, conversation and awesome adult
fun. Of course, both of the ladies shave down under. I (male)
did not shave down under, I never have! We were surprised
to see our male friend of this ...
0 Commentaires, 41 Consultations,
10 Votes
,4.58 Score
|
|
Does humor has priority for you in a relationship ? 17/11/2017
Does humor has priority for you in a relationship ?
5 Commentaires, 52 Consultations,
36 Votes
,5.31 Score
|
|
Whipped 14/11/2017
Ladies if its you husband or boyfriends or nsa friends birthday
would you ever put whipped cream on your pussy and tits as
a gift for that man in your life and let he lick it all away?
11 Commentaires, 86 Consultations,
43 Votes
,6.41 Score
|
|
Whipped 14/11/2017
Ladies if its you husband or boyfriends or nsa friends birthday
would you ever put whipped cream on your pussy and tits as
a gift for that man in your life and let he lick it all away?
3 Commentaires, 31 Consultations,
15 Votes
,2.82 Score
|
|
Me enamora ... 26/10/2017
Me enamora la gente que dice lo que piensa y que realmente
piensa lo que dice <br><br>
. Que no es fácil. La que defiende sus ideas y sus emociones,
porque son suyas y sinceras. <br><br>
Pero sin imponerlas a los demás, sin juzgar a quien piensa
diferente <br><br>
y sin compararse con quien no las comparte.
3 Commentaires, 21 Consultations,
18 Votes
,2.99 Score
|
|
AWKWARD SITUATION 19/9/2017
I was with my chick at a bar when we met up with her ex husband's
friend with his chick. I said hello to him and he said, 'Hey,
ya gotta big dick?" I laughed at first and sat down.
<br><br>
He was one of those egotistical dudes that think there on
top of the world because he has tattoos, motorcycle, and
a good paying job. He looked like Ray Liotta from ...
4 Commentaires, 117 Consultations,
26 Votes
,3.67 Score
|
|
Go Figure! 14/9/2017
I had a crush on my friends sister but it seemed like every
time she was dating someone then I was not and when I was she
was not. I really wanted to be with her but over time she got
married to a total jerk. She was married before to a jerk
so I guess she is attracted to jerks. Maybe that is why we
never dated - just saying lol.
7 Commentaires, 42 Consultations,
19 Votes
,4.44 Score
|
|
you have to be funny 13/9/2017
i think that all relationships have to have a good sense
of humor it lightens the mood sometimes when tensions are
high
3 Commentaires, 37 Consultations,
17 Votes
,3.97 Score
|
|
fun 23/8/2017
enjoy babes!!
0 Commentaires, 14 Consultations,
12 Votes
,3.51 Score
|
|
Wolf of Pig 20/8/2017
[image1] 《The Three Little Pigs》 Once upon a time there were three little pigs. When they grew up, they left their parents to live their first
winter by themselves. Autumn came and it began raining. The three
little pigs started to feel they needed a real house to live in. They
talked about how to build a house and prepare for the coming
winter, but each decided ...
2 Commentaires, 73 Consultations,
20 Votes
,4.02 Score
|
|
freedom 14/8/2017
commitment = loss of freedom lol!!!
0 Commentaires, 22 Consultations,
18 Votes
,5.44 Score
|
|
caught 9/7/2017
getting caught by your gf while wanking is total fun lol
1 Commentaires, 26 Consultations,
18 Votes
,3.94 Score
|
|
freedom 4/7/2017
freedom compromises after commitment
0 Commentaires, 8 Consultations,
4 Votes
,2.08 Score
|
|
When a girl says ... 27/5/2017
When a Woman says, "OK, have fun."
Do not have fun. Abort the mission. I repeat. Abort the mission.
1 Commentaires, 49 Consultations,
20 Votes
,4.40 Score
|
|
Porn Is a Crucial Part of My Relationship 20/5/2017
I love porn. I'm not embarrassed to say it. I'm
not picky about where I watch it. Sometimes I watch it in
bed while my boyfriend's at home. Other times I watch
it on our couch when I need a break from my three jobs and he
is still at work. And my taste runs the gamut, though I tend
to veer towards watching public sex and threesomes.
Oh, and maybe you caught this: I have a boyfriend. ...
1 Commentaires, 69 Consultations,
17 Votes
,4.12 Score
|
|
People who do not understand other people 30/4/2017
So I work with this guy who decided the best way for him to
find the girl of his dreams is to try to meet someone, from
another country, online. He had a picture of this girl he
was talking to and was so happy... Only problem was when
he showed me it was a picture of a pornstar. Aside from this
she also claimed to be in South Africa, yeah that country
known for being terrible, and needed money ...
3 Commentaires, 58 Consultations,
17 Votes
,2.84 Score
|
|
Love Line 2/4/2017
Love line with Adam needs to come back so bad...guys you
need to listen.
8 Commentaires, 74 Consultations,
42 Votes
,2.62 Score
|
|
Married or Single 25/3/2017
I was wondering what type of situation most women prefer
here. When one is involved, do you prefer to find someone
else who is also in a relationship or is preferable to find
a single man. What do the single women here prefer. I like
a drama free situation with someone fun and outgoing, but
I am single and keep my options open.
5 Commentaires, 57 Consultations,
22 Votes
,4.57 Score
|
|
oldie but goodie 15/2/2017
One day a man was waking along the beach when he tripped over
a lamp. He turned around and kicked the lamp out of anger.
A few seconds later, a Genie popped out of the lamp, An angry
Genie, because the man had kicked his lamp.
Reluctantly, the genie said, "Even though you kicked
me, I shall still give you three wishes as your reward for
releasing me. However, because of what you did, I ...
4 Commentaires, 106 Consultations,
19 Votes
,3.65 Score
|
|
Opps have you been recognized by, friends, coworkers, family? 2/2/2017
So has it happened to you any thing bad come of it? Anything good come of it?
Or just embarrassed....
I was recognized in my blk dress this week! opps family...,
mmmmm coworker!
20 Commentaires, 299 Consultations,
59 Votes
,6.06 Score
|
|
Haaaaachu....!!!! 17/11/2016
A woman constantly keeps sneezing and goes to see the doctor.
She tells him, "Doctor, I constantly keep sneezing,
and every time I sneeze, I have an orgasm." The doctor
asks, "What are you doing for it?" The woman
replies, "Sniffing pepper."
5 Commentaires, 90 Consultations,
28 Votes
,4.78 Score
|
|
who can you trust 8/11/2016
Two couples were playing cards. Jeff accidentally dropped
some cards on the floor. When he bent down under the table
to pick them up, he noticed that Dave's wife, Sandy,
was not wearing any underwear! Shocked by this, Jeff hit
his head on the table and emerged red-faced.
Later when Jeff went to the kitchen to get some refreshments
Sandy followed him and asked, "Did you see anything
under ...
6 Commentaires, 276 Consultations,
26 Votes
,5.94 Score
|
|
Drunk 30/9/2016
Three guys are drinking in a bar when a drunk comes in, staggers up to the counter, and points at the guy in the middle,
shouting, "Your mom's the best sex in town! Great
Pussy!"
Everyone expects a fight, but the younger dude ignores
him, so the drunk wanders off and bellies up to the bar at the far end.
Ten minutes later, the old drunk comes back, points at the
same guy, and ...
3 Commentaires, 131 Consultations,
11 Votes
,4.10 Score
|
|
Weekend sex 30/9/2016
Would love to have sex- i said.
She gave me a glove...
Xxx
6 Commentaires, 57 Consultations,
10 Votes
,3.78 Score
|
|
false advertisment 21/9/2016
so awhile back i met a lady on Des celibataires pleins de ressources and what caught my attention
was that she said she loved to work out, but more importantly
(at least for me lol) she loved giving head. so after a few
weeks of getting to know each other, we were chatting one
friday night. she had a date that was running late or maybe
just blowing her off. i was home bored and jokely said if
you need some replacement dick, i'm ...
3 Commentaires, 228 Consultations,
21 Votes
,4.12 Score
|
|
Human Relationships 20/9/2016
Ultimately, the only way to make good friends is to become
a good friend yourself. Good people gather around other
good people.
2 Commentaires, 15 Consultations,
3 Votes
,3.43 Score
|
|
I am ready 8/9/2016
Was told that the other night- was excited. But the only
thing i was ready for- was to sleep... Age...
6 Commentaires, 45 Consultations,
15 Votes
,3.28 Score
|
|
.zdfgjkldfklhb 4/9/2016
respect is the most important value in the relationship
1 Commentaires, 15 Consultations,
6 Votes
,3.08 Score
|
|
Tires made of pussy 21/8/2016
We were having a discussion at the bar one afternoon. This
girl said, "If tires were made of pussy they would
never wear out!". I told her that it wouldn't
work. The whole world would then smell like fish!!
3 Commentaires, 56 Consultations,
16 Votes
,3.27 Score
|
|
Why do people always say things that arent? 2/8/2016
Why do girls always say they dont want anything serious,
then all of a sudden they want something serious? Why not just be straight up?
4 Commentaires, 37 Consultations,
11 Votes
,4.10 Score
|
|
paying for services 21/7/2016
When is cheating on your partener, if you go get a massage
with a happy ending is that cheating, if you pay for a service
is that cheating, women are offering all kinds of services
to men.
It does not mean you don't love your girl or wife!!
2 Commentaires, 32 Consultations,
13 Votes
,1.80 Score
|
|
The Fickle Times We Live In..... 15/4/2016
"Nevermind what's being said to you! Then maybe
you could learn to fuck better!"
That's what I said to her as I came in her mouth after,
a less than par blowjob.....
"Didn't you learn anything from those porn flicks
that you keep in your closet?!!"
I had asked her that before, and she hates it every time.
She then says to me, that, she thought I loved her, and she ...
1 Commentaires, 96 Consultations,
13 Votes
,0.46 Score
|
|
The case of my missing twix bars.... 15/4/2016
The first time in total, and in my hands I left a little bit
of a mess.....
It was just then, when, she was going through my emails that
i have sent here and there.....
So, I said to her that it was just all in good fun, and yes I
do online sex often....
She's so cute, and sweet, as well as, A's on my report
card....
Yeah, it was not able to make a difference ...
0 Commentaires, 53 Consultations,
9 Votes
,2.36 Score
|
|
Lessor of two evils 11/3/2016
"So let me get this straight, " the prosecutor
says to the defendant, "you came home from work early
and found your wife in bed with a strange man." "That's correct, " says the defendant.
"At which time, " continues the prosecutor,
"you take out a pistol and shoot your wife, killing
her." "That's correct, " says the defendant.
"Then my question to you is, why did you shoot your
wife and the man ...
0 Commentaires, 229 Consultations,
24 Votes
,4.95 Score
|
|
Make her scream... 11/3/2016
Hey guys... I figured out how you can make your girlfriend or wife or
whatever scream during sex.. It's super easy and it works every time... All ya gotta do.. While you are having sex take your phone... and call your girl and tell her about it...
5 Commentaires, 112 Consultations,
17 Votes
,4.68 Score
|
|
WINNER WINNER WINNER 11/3/2016
So, a man asks his wife "If I won the lottery, what would
you do?" His wife says, "Take half and leave you" The man smiles and says, "Good cuz I won 12 bux from
the lottery today, heres 6 now get out"
0 Commentaires, 50 Consultations,
11 Votes
,4.66 Score
|
|
Look how sexy my wife is... 6/2/2016
...That is all.
-Sexxxcrzd(m)
14 Commentaires, 174 Consultations,
26 Votes
,5.61 Score
|
|
the vagina!!! 31/1/2016
The best engine in the world is the Vagina. It can be started
with one finger, It is self lubricating, It takes any size
piston, And it changes it's own oil every four weeks.
It is only a pity that the management system is so fucking
temperamental.....
4 Commentaires, 120 Consultations,
41 Votes
,7.16 Score
|
|
its funny now not s much then 6/12/2015
nikki an myself was in bed and she says she has to pee.okay
I thought get up and go like any sane person would do.well
she for some reason got the idea to act like she was a dog and
omg she pissed on me!!and I don't mean just a lil I mean
straight full blast peed lol then says she was marking what
belongs to her lol I couldn't be mad after that bc it
was so funny and sweet at the same time yet ...
4 Commentaires, 98 Consultations,
21 Votes
,2.14 Score
|
|
wife joke 30/10/2015
A lady goes to the doctor and complains that her husband
is losing interest in sex. The doctor gives her a pill, but
warns her that it's still experimental. He tells her
to slip it into his mashed potatoes at dinner, so that night,
she does just that. About a week later, she’s back at the
doctor, where she says, "Doc, the pill worked great!
I put it in the potatoes like you said! It wasn't ...
14 Commentaires, 453 Consultations,
41 Votes
,6.76 Score
|
|
BBQ time 30/10/2015
A husband exclaims to his wife one day, "Your butt
is getting really big. It's bigger than the BBQ grill!"
Later that night in bed, the husband makes some advances
towards his wife who completely brushes him off. "What's
wrong?" he asks. She answers, "Do you really
think I'm going to fire up this big-ass grill for one
little weenie?"
5 Commentaires, 225 Consultations,
22 Votes
,5.77 Score
|
|
Always use condoms? 29/10/2015
Many will say YES! Let me state my case: 1st I was with the
same partner for over 20 yr.s before she passed away. Last
full physical showed No STDs & a sperm count so low,
as to not exist. 2nd I have a reaction to latex [Rash] &
little or no sensation. So, I ask if she can prove she is disease free - which I feel
is being honest- and that for reasons stated I don't
use condoms. Mostly, I get ...
1 Commentaires, 88 Consultations,
8 Votes
,1.86 Score
|
|
Always use condoms? 29/10/2015
Many will say YES! Let me state my case: 1st I was with the
same partner for over 20 yr.s before she passed away. Last
full physical showed No STDs & a sperm count so low,
as to not exist. 2nd I have a reaction to latex [Rash] &
little or no sensation. So, I ask if she can prove she is disease free - which I feel
is being honest- and that for reasons stated I don't
use condoms. Mostly, I get ...
3 Commentaires, 46 Consultations,
5 Votes
,4.12 Score
|
|
ANOTHER POEM FOR THE MAG -= SAD, FUNNY & LAME 22/8/2015
LAMO
We met in a chat room General conversation Things get hot & heavy She is coming over for sex. ‘Can’t see you till after work Be there by 8 AM my dear.’
She had sent a photo From the neck to her waist To whet my appetite I guess She was lovely, bare big breasted.
Troubled sleep – toss & turn Big Yoda is throbbing My mind is in a whirl Putting a face & name ...
2 Commentaires, 76 Consultations,
8 Votes
,3.25 Score
|
|
Karma 20/8/2015
Two former female neighbors met in the Afterlife, after
both suffering untimely deaths. Being surprised to see each other, they asked how they me
their fates. One woman said she froze to death. "Oh, my goodness!" the other replied, "that's
terrible" "Well; not SO bad" the other replied, "After
a while the cold went away, and I drifted off into a warm sleep"
The second woman said she died of a ...
3 Commentaires, 236 Consultations,
26 Votes
,5.40 Score
|
|
I Forget Stuff Sometimes 15/8/2015
I looked up at my ceiling the other day and as I was laying
there I saw what I thought to be a sliver of paint on it. I didn't
pay it any attention but I noticed that it had some limbs.
So obviously it's a bug. I grab the bug spray and down
it goes. I quickly picked it up off the floor and flush it
in the toilet. Moments later i get a knock at the door. So
I quickly answer the door as I am ...
0 Commentaires, 220 Consultations,
13 Votes
,2.64 Score
|
|
The Successful Son 3/8/2015
Four men went golfing one day. Three of them went to the 1st tee while the other went to to
the club house to pay the bill. The three men started bragging
on their sons. The first man said "My son is a successful home builder.
He's so successful that he gave a friend a new home for
free. The second man said "My son is such a good car salesman
that he know owns a multi-line dealership. And ...
4 Commentaires, 229 Consultations,
17 Votes
,5.67 Score
|
|
Listen up 15/7/2015
I was talking to my ex one day after sex and asked who is the
best lover you ever had ? I was feeling pretty sure she was
going to say me after the fancy fuck I just gave her but no
. Yap yap yap she went on and on . I kind of stoped listening
until I heard . And in the shower Rose said you might as well
wash my back and ass a deal is a deal . What ? What deal ? I asked
. Rose my second roommate ...
2 Commentaires, 304 Consultations,
15 Votes
,2.52 Score
|
|
gossipers!!! 15/6/2015
Mildred, the church gossiper and self-appointed monitor
of the church's morals, kept sticking her nose into
other people's business. Several members did not
approve of her extra curricular activities, but feared
her enough to maintain their silence.
She made a mistake, however, when she accused a new member,
Henry, of being an alcoholic after she saw his old pickup
parked in front of ...
3 Commentaires, 244 Consultations,
39 Votes
,6.82 Score
|
|
Fucked up families 4/6/2015
There's a story in one of the Charles Town, Wes Virginiay
news about a brother and sister who went to their sons High
School graduation because all three graduated on the same
day in 2008. The really weird thing is that he has several profiles on
this and other sites and uses a photo of him with his sister
taken at the Graduation Party in 2008. Now that is really fucked up!!!
...
0 Commentaires, 64 Consultations,
7 Votes
,3.55 Score
|
|
my first romance 28/5/2015
haii friends, this is my real experience in my life.once
my Aunty's daughter came to my house for spend her holidays.she
was very beautiful and sexy.I loved her so much.one day
night do small fighting between she and her mom.then she
get nervous feeling. and she come to my bed beside of me.then
time is gone.then I put my hand at her PUSSY.then she shifted
her face beside of my face, and she give ...
0 Commentaires, 121 Consultations,
7 Votes
,2.28 Score
|
|
Having sex with The King! Thank you.. Thank you very much... 15/4/2015
I have always found ways to make a girl bust up laughing;
while we have sex.. Creative singing is one them.. I have a knack for turning something innocent; into something
naughty..... For instance.. I heard an Elvis song while driving to a date.
Latter when we were ready for a romp, I sang my dirty version.
It went like this: Are you lonesome tonight?... ...
2 Commentaires, 94 Consultations,
11 Votes
,4.66 Score
|
|
For Fun 15/3/2015
A boss said to his secretary I want to have SEX with you I will
make it very fast. I'll throw $1000 on the floor, by
the time you bend down to pick it I'll be done. She thought
for a moment then called her boyfriend and told him the story.
Her boyfriend then said to her, do it but "Ask him for
$2000, pick up the money very fast he wouldn't even
have enough time to undressed himself." So she ...
3 Commentaires, 244 Consultations,
20 Votes
,4.53 Score
|
|
My Date From Hell! 18/2/2015
Written by: KyCre8iveGuy
NOW THE STORY YOU ARE ABOUT TO READ, MAY SEEM TOTALLY WEIRD
AND COMPLETELY CRAZY…BUT HAND OVER MY HEART…IT’S
THE COMPLETE TRUTH!!
I met a young lady on a Transgendered website. She was 35-years-old,
had long blonde, beautiful hair and the face and body of
a Goddess. We chatted for a while on the website and through
personal emails. Eventually, we ...
6 Commentaires, 297 Consultations,
39 Votes
,4.62 Score
|
|
IRONY 13/1/2015
Isn't it Ironic that this page is blank, can one surmise
from that that there is nothing funny about sex? from my
experience it can't be so, many a gut splitting laugh
has come out of the absurd situation we sometimes find ourselves
in in the pursuit of sex.
0 Commentaires, 35 Consultations,
8 Votes
,3.01 Score
|
|
Romantic 2/12/2014
"I could stay awake just to hear you breathing...Watch
you smile while you're sleeping..." Aerosmith = Romantic Me = Restraining Order
2 Commentaires, 44 Consultations,
10 Votes
,2.59 Score
|
|
Dead Roses! 21/11/2014
On my fifth wedding anniversary i decided to get my wife
a dozen red roses, they looked a little wilted and thought
that they just needed some water and some miracle grow for
flowers. I bought the roses thinking that i could bring
them back to life somehow. When i got home if put them in vase
with some water and miracle grow. An hour had passed and
they looked a little bit better but still looked ...
2 Commentaires, 91 Consultations,
5 Votes
,2.49 Score
|
|
A Realization After Sex 13/11/2014
So the encounter began as hot and passionate as ever! She
started unbuttoning my shirt, but had to raise her arms
so I could throw HER shirt off! She must have thought, forget
the buttons, and tried to pull mine over my head too!
We were tearing each other's clothes off like they
were on fire!
She went for my belt, I went for her bra, and after struggling
like I was trying to ...
3 Commentaires, 231 Consultations,
18 Votes
,3.26 Score
|
|
Funny 12/11/2014
Have you ever gotten rug burns from having sex on a carpet?
There's nothing funny about it the next morning.
18 Commentaires, 133 Consultations,
29 Votes
,5.25 Score
|
|
Testimonials 7/11/2014
If you get one do you always allow it to show up on your profile
or do you sometimes hide them?
5 Commentaires, 67 Consultations,
14 Votes
,3.30 Score
|
|
Going 31/10/2014
Funny how the longer you know someone the more you get use
to seeing them going to the bathroom and how little it matters.
11 Commentaires, 126 Consultations,
24 Votes
,6.20 Score
|
|
Humor 21/10/2014
We think it's really funny how many guys want us to watch
them jerk off on cam. Do they really think that's what
people on here want to see? Oh and just an added note for those
of you that think a woman is watching you on all those couple
profiles. It isn't.
9 Commentaires, 90 Consultations,
19 Votes
,4.44 Score
|
|
Funny? 15/10/2014
If you write me and ask to fuck, suck or perform any other
sex act with you before we've had a chance to chat first
then I'll know you're just being funny.
10 Commentaires, 108 Consultations,
25 Votes
,6.56 Score
|
|
Understanding Women 1/10/2014
A Woman's Vocabulary, Keywords and Meanings (as taken
from an interview with a woman)
FINE This is the word we use at the end of any argument in which
we feel we are right, but need to shut you up. NEVER use 'Fine'
to describe how a woman looks. This will cause you to have
one of those arguments.
FIVE MINUTES This is half an hour. It is equivalent to the five minutes that your ...
3 Commentaires, 56 Consultations,
9 Votes
,4.07 Score
|
|
Understanding Men 1/10/2014
"IT'S A GUY THING" Translated: "There is no rational thought pattern
connected with it, and you have no chance at all of making
it logical."
"CAN I HELP WITH DINNER?" Translated: "Why isn't it already on the table?"
"UH HUH, " "SURE, HONEY, " OR "YES,
DEAR" Translated: Absolutely nothing. It's a conditioned
response.
"IT WOULD TAKE TOO LONG TO EXPLAIN" Translated: "I ...
2 Commentaires, 42 Consultations,
7 Votes
,3.80 Score
|
|
When Alice Went Deer Hunting 1/10/2014
It was Saturday morning as Jake, an avid hunter, woke up
ready to go bag the first deer of the season. He walks down
to the kitchen to get a cup of coffee, and to his surprise
he finds his wife, Alice, sitting there, fully dressed
in camouflage.
Jake asks her: "What are you up to?"
Alice smiles: "I'm going hunting with you!"
Jake, though he had many reservations about ...
2 Commentaires, 200 Consultations,
13 Votes
,4.82 Score
|
|
Hard Liquor... 20/9/2014
Two female co-workers are chatting it up, and they are discussing
the boyfriends they’ve had in the last year. One girl
says "The last 3 boyfriends I’ve had, I’ve named
after soda pops. The first one i called 7up, because he had
7 inches and he knew how to keep it up. The second one i called
mountain dew, because when it came to mounting he knew what
to do. The third i called Jack Daniels." ...
8 Commentaires, 279 Consultations,
25 Votes
,6.67 Score
|
|
Lunch would be ready...... 15/9/2014
A little girl runs out to the backyard where her father is
working, and asks him, "Daddy, what's sex?"
Her father sits her down, and tells her all about the birds
and the bees. He tells her about conception, sexual intercourse,
sperms and eggs. He goes on to tell her about puberty, menstruation,
erections, wet-dreams...and he thinks, what the hell,
and goes on to tell her the works. He covers a ...
2 Commentaires, 247 Consultations,
21 Votes
,6.84 Score
|
|
Three kinds of each... 6/9/2014
A family is at the dinner table. The son asks the father,
"Dad, how many kinds of boobs are there?" The
father, surprised, answers, "Well, son, a woman
goes through three phases. In her 20s, her breasts are like
melons, round and firm. In her 30s and 40s, they are like
pears, still nice, hanging a bit. After 50, they are like
onions." "Onions?" the son asks. "Yes.
You see them and they make you ...
3 Commentaires, 157 Consultations,
20 Votes
,4.91 Score
|
|
Lesbian joke #69 4/9/2014
What do you call a can of tuna on a lesbian's coffee table?
Potpourri
2 Commentaires, 88 Consultations,
19 Votes
,3.26 Score
|
|
bar joke 19/7/2014
A guy walks into a bar and says to the barman, "Give
me six double vodkas."
The barman says, "Wow, you must have had one hell of
a day."
"Yeah, I just found out my oldest son is gay."
The next day, the same guy comes into the bar and asks for
six double vodkas. When the bartender asks what's wrong, the man says,
"I just found out that my youngest son is gay, too!" ...
7 Commentaires, 342 Consultations,
24 Votes
,6.65 Score
|
|
Joke... 27/6/2014
How do you know you just had a good blow job?
- When she gives you a blow job she sucks the sheets up your
ass.
Now how do you know the woman that just gave you that blow
job is a good girl?
- She pulls the sheets back out for you.
2 Commentaires, 88 Consultations,
25 Votes
,3.91 Score
|
|
SIR 30/4/2014
A
1 Commentaires, 59 Consultations,
6 Votes
,1.66 Score
|
|
Fun Facts about the Great Vagina 28/4/2014
Fun Facts about the Great Vagina
7 Commentaires, 262 Consultations,
26 Votes
,7.02 Score
|
|
Interesting facts about the Penis 28/4/2014
Interesting facts about the Penis
6 Commentaires, 177 Consultations,
24 Votes
,7.33 Score
|
|
Getting rid of Ex 4/4/2014
An explorer goes into an undiscovered tomb for the first
time, and in the center of the tomb there’s a lamp. He picks
it up, and as he starts to rub the dirt off of it, a genie comes
out of the lamp and says, “I want to know the person you
hate the most.” The explorer says, “That’s gotta
be my ex-wife. Why?” “I am a cursed genie. I will grant
you three wishes, but whatever you wish ...
3 Commentaires, 284 Consultations,
17 Votes
,5.39 Score
|
|
how are people born? 4/4/2014
A child asked his father, "How were people born?"
So his father said, "Adam and Eve made babies, then
their babies became adults and made babies, and so on."
The child then went to his mother, asked her the same question
and she told him, "We were monkeys then we evolved
to become like we are now." The child ran back to his
father and said, "You lied to me!" His father
replied, "No, your mom was ...
3 Commentaires, 171 Consultations,
11 Votes
,4.85 Score
|
|
what women would do if they had a penis for a day 4/3/2014
10. Get ahead faster in corporate America.
9. Get a blow job.
8. Find out what is so fascinating about beating the meat.
7. Pee standing up while talking to other men at a urinal.
6. Determine WHY you can't hit the bowl consistently.
5. Find out what it's like to be on the other end of a surging
orgasm.
4. Touch yourself in public ...
4 Commentaires, 87 Consultations,
11 Votes
,5.04 Score
|
|
WHAT MEN WOULD DO IF THEY HAD A VAGINA FOR A DAY 4/3/2014
10. Immediately go shopping for zucchini and cucumbers.
9. Squat over a hand-held mirror for an hour and a half.
8. See if they could finally do the splits.
7. See if it's truly possible to launch a ping pong ball
20 feet.
6. Cross their legs without rearranging their crotch.
5. Get picked up in a bar in less than 10 minutes ... BEFORE
closing ...
2 Commentaires, 63 Consultations,
7 Votes
,4.82 Score
|
|
25 Secrets Girls Have To Know About Guys 4/3/2014
. Guys don't actually look after good-looking girls.
They prefer neat and presentable girls.
2. Guys hate flirts.
3. A guy can like you for a minute, and then forget you afterwards.
4. When a guy says he doesn't understand you, it simply
means you're not thinking the way he is.
5. "Are you doing something?" or "Have
you eaten already?" are the first usual ...
1 Commentaires, 68 Consultations,
4 Votes
,2.86 Score
|
|
long distance 23/2/2014
How To Have A Long Distance Relationship VideoJug is here to help if geography is getting in the way
of you and your loved one. Follow our guide on how to have
a long distance relationship, and keep your relationship
alive despite where you are in the world.
Step 1: Talk it through
You need to discuss your expectations of the relationship
once you are apart, and set ...
0 Commentaires, 22 Consultations,
1 Votes
,2.40 Score
|
|
If You Use Handcuffs, Always Keep a Spare Key Handy 1/2/2014
I've even got a better idea, make sure you have one key
on a string, around your wrist before you play, and have
a spare on your key ring.
The reason? My two best friends, Ted and Bobbi and I play around quite
a bit. Sometimes I go to their house for MFM threesome, sometimes
they come over to my house to have a mfmf party with Debbie
and me.
And sometimes, Ted and Bobbi just get ...
3 Commentaires, 173 Consultations,
8 Votes
,4.64 Score
|
|
Foodie 27/1/2014
Urban Dictionary defines foodie as: a douchebag who likes
food; though the terms "gastronome" and "epicure"
define the same thing.
I don't remember being an asshole due to my foodism,
I have however perceived others as such when my desire for
certain foods or eateries were denied.
...which I guess does indeed make me a douchebag.
But who could resist the succulent steak ...
1 Commentaires, 41 Consultations,
8 Votes
,2.78 Score
|
|
What Annie didn't tell you.............. 23/1/2014
....was that before she rolled the damn can of Crème of
Mushroom soup perfectly under my right foot was:
1. the fact that we have wood floors and they had just been
polished.
2. I was wearing socks, not shoes at the time of impact.
3. She had just opened the cupboard above me slamming me
in the head with the bottom corner of the oak cabinet
4. That ...
3 Commentaires, 101 Consultations,
10 Votes
,3.19 Score
|
|
Too Many Cooks in the Kitchen Ruin the Meal (er, uh, ruin one's head) 23/1/2014
My husband Danny is an excellent chef. If it can be grilled,
he can grille it like no one's ever grilled meat before.
If it can be broiled, he can broil it to perfection. He can
bake, fry, you name it.
However, sometimes we'll have guests coming over
for a big dinner and he needs help in the kitchen....that's
where I come in...or at least I used to.
He gave me a list of ...
4 Commentaires, 156 Consultations,
7 Votes
,4.06 Score
|
|
What to do 1/1/2014
What to do
0 Commentaires, 23 Consultations,
3 Votes
,0.49 Score
|
|
What to do 1/1/2014
What to do
0 Commentaires, 12 Consultations,
2 Votes
,2.42 Score
|
|
SPECIAL YESTERDAY BUT UNWANTED TODAY 30/11/2013
DO U KNOW WHAT HURTS THE MOST.........?
ITS WHEN SOMEONE MADE U FEEL VERY VERY SPECIAL YESTERDAY....................................................................................................................................................BUT....................................................................................MADE
U FEEL THAT U R THE MOST UNWANTED PERSON TODAY.....!! ...
3 Commentaires, 58 Consultations,
5 Votes
,3.47 Score
|
|
Glitter and Sparkles 1/10/2013
I was due for an appointment with the gynecologist later
in the week. Early one morning, I received a call from the
doctor's office to tell me that I had been rescheduled
for that morning at 9:30 am. I had only just packed everyone
off to work and school, and it was already around 8:45am.
The trip to his office took about 35 minutes, so I didn't
have any ...
3 Commentaires, 278 Consultations,
15 Votes
,5.73 Score
|
|
Glitter and Sparkles 1/10/2013
I was due for an appointment with the gynecologist later
in the week. Early one morning, I received a call from the
doctor's office to tell me that I had been rescheduled
for that morning at 9:30 am. I had only just packed everyone
off to work and school, and it was already around 8:45am.
The trip to his office took about 35 minutes, so I didn't
have any ...
3 Commentaires, 100 Consultations,
4 Votes
,4.80 Score
|
|
Flakes. 18/9/2013
Tell your funniest flake story!
1 Commentaires, 55 Consultations,
6 Votes
,1.94 Score
|
|
On being discreet... 9/9/2013
I cannot speak for everyone, but in the case of my wife and
I discretion is an absolute non-negotiable must. Her work
is sensitive to anything that may be conveyed as "alternative"
and my work is very publicly oriented where I talk to hundreds
of different people a week. On top of that we're also
involved in the community and have a lot of friends who might
not be ready to understand. So we ...
2 Commentaires, 162 Consultations,
9 Votes
,3.21 Score
|
|
Greener Grass 7/9/2013
Being that my husband was born and raised his whole life
here in this small County He is pretty well known and knows
most other locals that have been born and raised here. Its safe to say that when we meet new people If its through
a mutual friend , they have already been pre warned or pre
schooled that we are freaks. They don't know what to
expect and though they all at one time or another ...
2 Commentaires, 284 Consultations,
15 Votes
,3.28 Score
|
|
Ever Fart by accident while getting blowjob? 11/8/2013
haha
2 Commentaires, 64 Consultations,
6 Votes
,1.37 Score
|
|
Say it isn't so! 26/7/2013
A hysterical woman came into
the ER. She'd just had a fight with her boyfriend while
sitting in his parked car. She said she had gotten so mad
at him that she pulled the key out of the ignition and put
it in her vagina so he couldn't drive home! Now she couldn't
locate the key to get it out. I couldn't find it either,
so we concluded that it must have fallen out ...
4 Commentaires, 364 Consultations,
13 Votes
,2.81 Score
|
|
Maybe you? 26/7/2013
"One night, a gurney rolled
in carrying a woman in black lingerie-who happened to be
straddling a naked man. They told us that they had been doing
a lot of drugs and having wild sex when the woman's vagina
cramped up and the guy couldn't pull out. The doctor
on duty gave her muscle relaxants, and after several minutes,
they were able to separate. Then they were promptly ...
4 Commentaires, 323 Consultations,
10 Votes
,4.58 Score
|
|
funny 6/6/2013
tha daughter ask her dad to use tha car he say wat u goin to
do for me she says idk wat do u want so he says i want a bj she
says thats sick ur my dad he says do u want tha car r not so she
starts suckin then she stops and looks at her dad and says
dad whys ur dick taste like shit so he says that reminds me
ur brothers using tha car
1 Commentaires, 198 Consultations,
9 Votes
|
|
I want to know why the sexually frustrated, sexually depraved women go for my Danny 16/3/2013
Are there any other guys out there that get hit on by divorced,
sexually depraved, sexually frustrated women like my
Danny does.
I swear the boy must have the record for banging girls that
are divorced and who haven't had sex with anyone since
they split with their husbands.
Danny can relate story after story to me about how these
women, many of them cougars, seduce him and, ...
5 Commentaires, 354 Consultations,
22 Votes
,3.49 Score
|
|
Quit smoking 15/3/2013
A very smart doctor once told me that the only way for a man
to kill himself slowly over a period of 30-40 years while
spending huge amounts of moneey other than smoking was
to get married,
2 Commentaires, 175 Consultations,
8 Votes
,3.48 Score
|
|
SEXTING 11/2/2013
Text SEX 2win a BABY. 1t per sperm. Offer ends wen some-1
is pregnant. Lucky draw will b held @ d labour ward. promosen
starts wen U make love with some-1 & ends wen U ar satisfied,
hurry now! limited partners. So get started now!
0 Commentaires, 142 Consultations,
6 Votes
,1.94 Score
|
|
Using One Friend to Make Another Girl Jealous, I Instead Made Them Into Lovers 2/2/2013
Sometimes our best ideas become our worst nightmares.....
Sometimes what seems like a good idea one minute comes back
to bite us in the ass the very next second.
By using Diane, my best bi-sexual friend and lover to get
Katie jealous, I instead turned them into lovers.
Katie never really left Earl, she remained married to him
for years, but Katie made love to Diane ...
3 Commentaires, 269 Consultations,
20 Votes
,4.66 Score
|
|
Fun at the Gentleman’s Club 27/10/2012
Fun at the Gentleman’s Club
I have been on Des celibataires pleins de ressources off and on now for several years. I have
met some great ladies and continue to be friends. A short time ago, I contacted a lady on Des celibataires pleins de ressources and she stated
she was a dancer. I chatted with her and finally went to meet
her at her club. It was not one of the fancier ones in the area,
but reminded me of a club I liked in Pennsylvania. As we chatted ...
3 Commentaires, 368 Consultations,
13 Votes
,1.47 Score
|
|
accidental slip 20/10/2012
alright i very much like the doggy position. as a girl is
it a big deal when a guy slips his dick in the asshole instead
of the pussy on accident.
0 Commentaires, 19 Consultations,
1 Votes
|
|
Article Title 12/9/2012
Article Body
0 Commentaires, 4 Consultations,
0 Votes
|
|
Funny only now, many years later 11/8/2012
I'm in college and pick out this good looking freshman
during orientation.
That night I'm munching away on a her and suddenly get
a string in my mouth.
Yep, you guessed it.
So I stop, grab a quick, long swig from the beer bottle and
ask her if she's on the the rag.
Comes out no boyfriend had ever eating her before and she
didn't realize there was anything ...
5 Commentaires, 274 Consultations,
12 Votes
,3.51 Score
|
|
humor 3/7/2012
so has anyone been farted on during sex. not a sex fart but
an actual fart. it has happened to me numerous times. i almost
burst out in laughter each time. is this normal for girls
to fart during sex
7 Commentaires, 130 Consultations,
3 Votes
,2.45 Score
|
|
Lost condom ?? 12/6/2012
Would some of you like to share your humorous moments with
you lover. I will share on of mine, we had lots of fun and some
good sex, we were using a condom of course. After playtime
we were looking for the condom to put it in the garbage, well
we took apart the bed, looked under the bed, on the floor...could
not find it, so we thought we should look and see what had
turned out on the ...
6 Commentaires, 457 Consultations,
25 Votes
,5.90 Score
|
|
IMPORTANT 30/5/2012
HUMOR IN RELATIONSHIP IS IMPORTANT AND ADVISABLE
3 Commentaires, 55 Consultations,
4 Votes
,2.08 Score
|
|
swinger or swingers 15/3/2012
here is some food for thought if you and your partner are
active swingers , but this time you do your own thing(have
sex with another swinger couple) without your partner.
do they have the right to be upset about it
2 Commentaires, 145 Consultations,
3 Votes
,2.45 Score
|
|
Humor and Attraction : who likes jokers ?? 24/2/2012
Have you heard the one about the relationship scientist
who walks into a bar with a journal under one arm and a duck
under the other? Never mind...it wasn’t very funny to
begin with. If that's the only joke you know, will your
lackluster sense of humor hurt you when it comes to attracting
a romantic partner? It turns out that the use and importance
of humor differs between men and women in ...
0 Commentaires, 35 Consultations,
1 Votes
|
|
First Date Fuck-Ups, episode 2 7/2/2012
I met Jose (not his real name, to protect the guilty), while
I was pumping gas & he was cleaning the canopy over the
gas pumps. He would splash a little water to make me think
it had started sprinkling. He did this twice before I looked
up to see him. He then asked if I would like to go to a movie
Friday. He was very good looking so I answered yes. He told
me where his second job is, what time he ...
5 Commentaires, 524 Consultations,
24 Votes
,4.61 Score
|
|
Singles 1/2/2012
"If you're going to cheat, you shouldn't
be in a relationship."
Is it just me, or do you hear single people say this a helluva
lot more than those in relationships?
1 Commentaires, 86 Consultations,
2 Votes
|
|
april fool 30/1/2012
you walk into a room and find your lover and your best friend
under the sheets both naked. when they see you, they both
scream april fool. you look at the calender and realise
its april 1st. what would you do.
9 Commentaires, 371 Consultations,
15 Votes
,3.28 Score
|
|
Ed the Chicken ! 4/1/2012
Ed came home drunk one night, slid into bed beside his
sleeping wife, and fell into a deep slumber.
He awoke before the Pearly Gates, where St. Peter said,
'You died in your sleep, Ed.'
Ed was stunned. 'I'm dead? No, I can't be!
I've got too much to live for. Send me back!'
St. Peter said, 'I'm sorry, but there's only
one way you can go back, and that is as a ...
5 Commentaires, 372 Consultations,
16 Votes
,3.42 Score
|
|
Laughter in bed 17/11/2011
Sex is the major component of a relationship and so aslong
as you maintain it you maintain your relationship.alot
of humour can be brought out of sex if you look deep enuf, your
partners body is a store of humour that you can use, just
make a sexy seductive joke abouts yours or their body and
see how fast the laughter will lead you two to the bedroom.have
some naughty humour in your relationship ...
0 Commentaires, 63 Consultations,
2 Votes
,1.04 Score
|
|
her,or so she says 9/10/2011
watching wife having her first girl/girl 69 in the back
of our Subaru wagon . Let me set the story:i had hooked up
my buddy with this girl who was staying with shannon and
i.a mutual friend brought her over, asking if she could
stay a few weeks. she was a tall redhead , kinda thick (in
a good way)green eyes big full lips , sexy as hell and was
very open about her bi-sexuality a true ...
7 Commentaires, 571 Consultations,
39 Votes
,4.62 Score
|
|
Pitfalls vs Pussies? 23/8/2011
I'm just curious to know what women prefer in bed. I'm
sure if your sitting at home right now with the moggy on your
lap your gonna say pussy right? But if you had put pussy to
bed 5 min ago, and walked into your bedroom, What would you
be expecting to find?
A bottle of wine and chocolate, a whip or other? I understand everyone here states their preferences,
but I'm seeking here ...
2 Commentaires, 122 Consultations,
5 Votes
,1.84 Score
|
|
humor 13/8/2011
we all need to laugh and humor can help us all relax, sexually
it is v important
1 Commentaires, 44 Consultations,
7 Votes
,2.02 Score
|
|
Bra Sizes 27/7/2011
Have u ever wondered why A, B, C, D, DD, E, F, G, and H are the
Letters used to define bra sizes? But couldn't figure
out what the letters stood for. Well its time you became
informed! (A) Almost tits. ( Barely there. (C) Can't Complain! (D) Damn! (DD) Double Damn! (E) Enormous! (F) Fake. (G) Get a Reduction. (H )Help me, I've fallen and I can't get up!
10 Commentaires, 513 Consultations,
36 Votes
,4.45 Score
|
|
Noble King Arthur 29/6/2011
King Arthur
Young King Arthur was ambushed and imprisoned by the monarch
of a neighboring kingdom. The monarch could have killed
him, but was moved by Arthur’s youth and ideals. So, the
monarch offered him freedom, as long as he could answer
a very difficult question. Arthur would have a year to figure
out the answer; if, after a year, he still had no answer,
he would be put to ...
3 Commentaires, 290 Consultations,
12 Votes
,6.16 Score
|
|
Like a Tiger 29/6/2011
A couple was on their honeymoon, lying in bed, about ready
to consummate their marriage, when the new bride says to
the husband, "I have a confession to make, I’m not
a virgin."
The husband replies, "That’s no big thing in this
day and age."
The wife continues, "Yeah, I’ve been with one guy."
"Oh yeah? Who was the guy?"
"Tiger Woods."
"Tiger ...
1 Commentaires, 384 Consultations,
11 Votes
,3.35 Score
|
|
The Old Farmer 29/6/2011
The old farmer sat rocking on the front porch as he talked
to the stranger. "Been thirty years since I lost my
wife in these woods."
"Oh, I’m sorry, " the stranger said, "It
must have been hard to lose your wife like that."
"Hard?" the farmer snorted, "Was damn
near impossible! She knew those woods like the back of her
hand!"
1 Commentaires, 382 Consultations,
9 Votes
,3.64 Score
|
|
the Big Game Hunter 23/6/2011
The big game hunter walked into the bar and bragged to everyone
about his hunting skills. The man was undoubtedly a good
shot and none could dispute that. But then he said they could
blindfold him and he would recognize any animal’s skin
from it’s feel, and if he could locate the bullet hole
he would even tell them what caliber bullet it was that killed
the animal.
The hunter said ...
1 Commentaires, 261 Consultations,
10 Votes
,3.98 Score
|
|
Piece of Cake 23/6/2011
Little Johnny walked into the kitchen, saw his mother making
a cake and announced, "I'm gonna go play in my
room for a couple of hours. I sure would like a piece of cake
after though!
Later, when his mother brought him a piece of cake, Little
Johnny exclaimed, "Wow!, it worked!"
Puzzled, his mother asked, "What do you mean?"
Little Johnny replied, "Daddy said that in ...
1 Commentaires, 298 Consultations,
5 Votes
,4.12 Score
|
|
Sex at Seven 23/6/2011
A typical macho man married a typical good-looking redheaded
lady and after the wedding, laid down the following rules:
"I'll be home when I want, if I want and at what
time I want and I don't expect any hassle from you. I
expect a great dinner to be on the table unless I tell you
otherwise. I'll go hunting, fishing, boozing, and
card-playing when I want with my old buddies and don't
you ...
1 Commentaires, 258 Consultations,
5 Votes
,3.14 Score
|
|
Two Friends 23/6/2011
Two friends, a blonde and a brunette, are walking down the
street and pass a flower shop where the brunette happens
to see her boyfriend buying flowers.
She sighs and says, "Oh, crap, my boyfriend is buying
me flowers again...for no reason."
The blonde looks quizzically at her and says, "What’s
the big deal, don’t you like getting flowers?"
The brunette says, "Oh ...
2 Commentaires, 316 Consultations,
10 Votes
,4.78 Score
|
|
"Joys of Parenting " 22/6/2011
A Woman's Experience With Children
For those who already have children past this age, this
is hilarious. For those who have children this age, this
is not funny. For those who have children nearing this age,
this is a warning. For those who have not yet had children,
this is birth control.
The following came from an anonymous mother.
Things I've learned from my children ...
2 Commentaires, 275 Consultations,
12 Votes
,5.63 Score
|
|
Women 22/6/2011
Whatever women do they must do twice as well as men to be thought
half as good. Luckily, this is not difficult. --Charlotte Whitton
Guys are like dogs. They keep coming back. Ladies are like
cats. Yell at a cat one time...they're gone. --Lenny Bruce
I love women. They're the best thing ever created.
If they want to be like men and come down to our level, that's
fine. --Mel ...
1 Commentaires, 154 Consultations,
1 Votes
,3.70 Score
|
|
Vacation 22/6/2011
A couple went on vacation to a fishing resort. The husband
liked to fish at the crack of dawn; his wife preferred to
read. One morning the husband returned after several hours
of fishing and decided to take a nap.
The wife, to escape her snoring husband, decided to take
the boat out. Since she was not familiar with the lake, she
rowed out to the middle, anchored the boat, and started ...
1 Commentaires, 279 Consultations,
6 Votes
,5.36 Score
|
|
Starting a fight 5/6/2011
A wife and her husband were watching "Who wants to
be a millionaire"while they were in bed.Husband
turns to the wife and said Do you want to have sex?"NO"
she answered.He then turns and ask, Is that your final
answer? THis time without even looking at him simply reply
"YES" So then husband turns and said ok I like
to phone a friend" THen the fight started.
0 Commentaires, 418 Consultations,
17 Votes
,2.42 Score
|
|
booted out 3/6/2011
A husband and his wife had a very bad argument.He left and
went to the bar. when he home three sheets to the wind. He
saw that all his clothes and tools were lying in the front
yard. When seeing this through blurry eyes he stormed in
the house and confronted wife."Bitch I know your
leaving but you sure in hell are not taking my stuff with
you"
2 Commentaires, 371 Consultations,
12 Votes
,3.68 Score
|
|
Show Some Manners! 17/4/2011
True Story!
I used to have a girlfriend who would always want to reach
for my dinner plate with her fork, or grab my drink, and just
help herself......without even asking! If she would have
at least asked first, I would have been gracious enough
to concede.
The next time I was ready for her.
We were double dating with a friend of ...
0 Commentaires, 56 Consultations,
3 Votes
,1.96 Score
|
|
Have you ever farted during sex? 6/4/2011
My first one night stand EVER I accidently let one slip while
she was blowing me. We laughed it off and I felt quite embarassed
until 2 minutes later she let one go as I brought her legs
over her shoulders. Girls do fart!
1 Commentaires, 24 Consultations,
3 Votes
,3.43 Score
|
|
SEEKING FOR THE RIGHT PERSON TO RELOCATE AND START A NEW LIFE WITH 5/4/2011
am looking to meet someone who is honest, sweet, caring, attractive, someone
who is getting tired of the bar scene, someone who is looking
for something that can turn into a long term relationship
and possibly marriage.but 4months ago i met a guy on the
internet promising me that he loves me and his from Africa
and told me to come and visit him and i pay him a visit he take
me to a hotel and ...
0 Commentaires, 32 Consultations,
3 Votes
,2.45 Score
|
|
Infidelity Discovered 14/3/2011
A man was having an affair with another woman and his wife
found out about it, so she told him "If you don't
end it now I'm gonna go downtown to the post office where
you work and tell everyone I see that you're a no good
cheating filthy bum."
The husband replied "You're gonna go downtown
to the post office where I work and tell everyone you see
that I'm a no good cheating filthy bum?" ...
3 Commentaires, 443 Consultations,
19 Votes
,2.46 Score
|
|
The Garden of Eden 14/3/2011
One day in the Garden of Eden, Eve calls out to God, "Lord,
I have a problem!"
"What's the problem, Eve?"
"Lord, I know you've created me and have provided
this beautiful garden and all of these wonderful animals,
and that hilarious comedy snake, but I'm just not happy."
"Why is that, Eve?" came the reply from above.
"Lord, I am lonely. And I'm sick to death of ...
2 Commentaires, 274 Consultations,
12 Votes
,3.33 Score
|
|
Magic Frog 14/3/2011
A woman was out golfing one day when she hit her ball into
the woods. She went into the woods to look for it and found
a frog in a trap. The frog said to her, "If you release
me from this trap, I will grant you 3 wishes."
The woman freed the frog and the frog said, "Thank
you, but I failed to mention that there was a condition to
your wishes-that whatever you wish for, your husband will ...
4 Commentaires, 240 Consultations,
9 Votes
,5.56 Score
|
|
My Wife and I Were Happy For Twenty Years....... 7/3/2011
My wife and I were happy for twenty years...then we met.
. I just got back from a pleasure trip - I drove my wife to the
airport
. After a quarrel, a husband said to his wife, "You know,
I was a fool when I married you." She replied, "Yes
dear, but I was in love and didn't notice
. One woman says to another, "Isn't your wedding
ring on the wrong finger?" The other woman ...
1 Commentaires, 286 Consultations,
4 Votes
,2.47 Score
|
|
the King 7/3/2011
The king was waving to his loyal subjects from the steps
of the palace when he spotted a beggar in the crowd who looked,
beneath the dirt and rags, amazingly like his royal self.
He had a guard bring the beggar to him and the crowd was likewise
struck by the remarkable resemblance. The king was amused,
for he knew that the king before him had a well-deserved
reputation as a ladies' man, as did he ...
1 Commentaires, 172 Consultations,
1 Votes
,2.40 Score
|
|
Red Flags and warning signs.... 7/3/2011
Red flags and warning sign. Is this you because I look for
these. If your new in town and ask me where the Methadone Clinic
is.........Warning
If the police already know your description....... Warning
If you know the county jail system better than the sheriff.....warning
To date somebody. If you have to get cleared by CPS or a Judge.........Warning
I know we ...
1 Commentaires, 48 Consultations,
1 Votes
,5.00 Score
|
|
Free Tattoo 7/3/2011
A man walks into a tattoo parlor and says he would like a $100
dollar bill on his dick. Well the tattoo artist laughs and
says "I'll do it for free if you can give me one
good reason for it."
The guy thinks for a second and says. "Well one, I like
to keep my money in my pants, two I like to watch my money grow,
and three I want to see how fast my wife can blow a $100.
1 Commentaires, 202 Consultations,
8 Votes
,4.17 Score
|
|
Just Try to be Strong 7/3/2011
A man escapes from prison where he has been for 15 years.
He breaks into a house to look for money and guns and finds
a young couple in bed.
He orders the guy out of bed and ties him to a chair, while
tying the girl to the bed he gets on top of her, kisses her
neck, then gets up and goes into the bathroom. While he's
in there, the husband tells his wife:
"Listen, this guy's an ...
3 Commentaires, 225 Consultations,
12 Votes
,5.63 Score
|
|
Off to Hawaii 7/3/2011
There was a couple who were big over-spenders. They always
dreamed to spend holidays in Hawaii, but were never able
to save any money to do so. One day they came up with an idea--each
time they had sex, they would put $20.00 bill into a piggy
bank.
They bought the piggy, and followed that procedure for
about a year. After that time, they decided that there was
enough money for their ...
1 Commentaires, 144 Consultations,
0 Votes
|
|
'reyan George" captured! 25/2/2011
recently i had the rare learning opportunity to deal with
a professional con artist on Des celibataires pleins de ressources.com.
I received a email from a lady naming herself reyan George
who only had one photo on her account. she quickly started
with a story about how she was looking for love and cherished
love etc. right away i knew something was up because it seemed
like it was a letter that was sent to ...
0 Commentaires, 150 Consultations,
3 Votes
,1.47 Score
|
|
Mrs. Boudreaux 25/2/2011
One night, a torrential rain soaked Southern Louisiana;
the next morning the resulting floodwaters came up about
6 feet into most of the homes there.
Mrs. Boudreaux was sitting on her roof with her neighbor,
Mrs.Thibodeaux, waiting for help to come. Mrs. Thibodeaux
noticed a baseball cap, floating near the house.
Then she saw it float far out into the front yard, then float
back ...
3 Commentaires, 181 Consultations,
4 Votes
,2.47 Score
|
|
Abstinance 18/2/2011
Three couples went in to see the minister to see how to become
members of his church. The minister said that they would
have to go without sex for two weeks and then come back and
tell him how it went. The first couple was retired, the second couple was middle
aged and the final couple was newlywed.
Two weeks went by, and the couples returned to the minister.
The retired couple said it ...
3 Commentaires, 172 Consultations,
7 Votes
,2.79 Score
|
|
Sexual Desire Enhancement 18/2/2011
Doc, you've gotta help me... my wife just isn't
interested in sex anymore. Haven't you got a pill or something I can give her?"
"Look, I can't prescribe..." "Doc, we've been friends for years. Have you
ever seen me this upset? I am desperate! I can't think; I can't concentrate;
my life is going utterly to Hell! You've got to help me." The doctor opens his desk drawer and removes a small bottle
of ...
3 Commentaires, 180 Consultations,
5 Votes
,2.82 Score
|
|
His and Her Diary 17/2/2011
Her Diary:
Tonight, I thought my husband was acting weird. We had made
plans to meet at a nice restaurant for dinner. I was shopping with my friends
all day long, so I thought he was upset at the fact that I was a bit late, but
he made no comment on it. Conversation wasn't flowing, so I suggested
that we go somewhere quiet so we could talk. He agreed, but he didn't say much. I asked
him ...
3 Commentaires, 179 Consultations,
7 Votes
,3.55 Score
|
|
reincarnation 16/2/2011
Jason came home from the pub late one Friday evening stinking
drunk (as he often did) and crept into bed beside his wife
who was already asleep.
He gave his wife a peck on the cheek and fell asleep. When he awoke he found a strange man standing at the end of
his bed wearing a long flowing white robe. “Who the hell are you?” Demanded Jason, “and what
are you doing in my bedroom?”. ...
1 Commentaires, 151 Consultations,
5 Votes
,3.14 Score
|
|
the Portrait 14/2/2011
Mrs. Johnson decided to have her own portrait painted by
a very famous artist. She told the artist, "Paint
me with 3-carat diamond earrings, a large diamond necklace,
glimmering emerald bracelets, and a beautiful red ruby
pendant." "But ma'am, you are not wearing any of those things."
"I know, " said Mrs. Johnson. "My health
is not good, and my husband is having an affair with his secretary.
When ...
1 Commentaires, 122 Consultations,
5 Votes
,3.14 Score
|
|
the Farmer and His Wife 6/2/2011
A farmer is lying in bed with his wife when he turns to her
grabs her tits and says "Honey if you could get milk
out of these we could sell the cow". Then he grabs her
pussy and says "Honey if you could get eggs out of here
we could sell the chickens". She turns to him smiles, grabs
his dick and says "Honey if you could get this up I could
get rid of your brother
1 Commentaires, 220 Consultations,
2 Votes
,2.42 Score
|
|
the Bus Ride 27/1/2011
An old maid wanted to travel by bus to the pet cemetery with
the remains of her cat. As she boarded the bus, she whispered
to the driver, I have a dead pussy.
The driver pointed to the woman in the seat behind him and
said, "Sit with my wife. You two have a lot in common.
1 Commentaires, 140 Consultations,
5 Votes
,2.49 Score
|
|
the in-laws 25/1/2011
A couple drove down a country road for several miles, not
saying a word. An earlier discussion had led to an argument and neither of
them wanted to concede their position.
As they passed a barnyard of mules, goats, and pigs, the
husband asked sarcastically, "Relatives of yours?"
"Yep, " the wife replied, "in-laws."
2 Commentaires, 172 Consultations,
2 Votes
,3.81 Score
|
|
expectations 24/1/2011
I've been on this site now on and off for several years.
I've had a lot of fun and I've enjoy meeting some
really wonderful people. I also been witness to some of
the absolutely most unrealistic expectations and narcissus
behavior imaginable. This always makes me smile.
The idea that someone using this site is someway more moral
than someone else is the height of stupidity, not ...
1 Commentaires, 58 Consultations,
3 Votes
|
|
dont do it ! 23/1/2011
A blonde who suspects her boyfriend of cheating on her goes
out and buys a gun. She goes to his apartment unexpectedly,
opens the door, and, sure enough, finds him naked in the
arms of a redhead. Well, now she’s angry. She opens her
purse and takes out the gun. But as she does so, she is overcome
with grief and points the gun at her own head.
The boyfriend yells, "No, honey, don’t do ...
1 Commentaires, 175 Consultations,
2 Votes
,2.42 Score
|
|
Revenge ? 22/1/2011
A woman and her boyfriend are out having a few drinks. While
they’re Sitting there having a good time together, she
starts talking about this Really great new drink. The more she talks about it, the more excited she gets, and
starts trying to talk her boyfriend into having one. After a while he gives in and lets her order the drink for
him. The Bartender brings the drink and puts the following ...
0 Commentaires, 175 Consultations,
8 Votes
,3.94 Score
|
|
Pizza Pizza 22/1/2011
My wife, on her way home, picked up a $5 pizza for dinner.
As we are eating it she fell on the floor and started having
convulsions. I grabbed and fumbled with the phone as I called
the 911 dispatch. As I knelt and attended to her the paramedic
unit arrived and started checking her out. They told me
not to be worried and that everything would be fine. She
was just having "Little Seizures."
1 Commentaires, 171 Consultations,
1 Votes
,3.70 Score
|
|
the bank hostages 22/1/2011
This guy robs a bank and takes hostages.
He asks one of the hostage, "Did you see me rob the bank?"
The hostage answers, "Yes."
The crook, promptly shoots him.
Then he asks the another hostage the same question, "Did
you see me rob the bank?"
The hostage answers, "No, but my wife over there did."
1 Commentaires, 125 Consultations,
0 Votes
|
|
the sex talk 16/1/2011
In a small town, an elderly couple had been dating each other
for a long time.
At the urging of their friends, they decided it was finally
time for marriage.
Before the wedding, they went out to dinner and had a long
conversation regarding how their marriage might work.
They discussed finances, living arrangements and so on.
Finally, the old gentleman decided ...
1 Commentaires, 152 Consultations,
8 Votes
,2.55 Score
|
|
the beer drinker 16/1/2011
A man walks in the door after a day at the office to find his
wife crying at the kitchen table. Whats wrong? he asks.
I went to the store today, and a horrible man looked up my
skirt. He said, ˜Id like to fill that with beer and drink
it, she sobs. I wish youd been there to kick his ass.
Listen, honey, Ive repeatedly told you to wear panties
every day, replies the husband. ...
1 Commentaires, 186 Consultations,
8 Votes
,3.01 Score
|
|
at dinner 16/1/2011
A man and a beautiful woman were having dinner in a fine restaurant.
Their waitress (taking another order at a table a few paces away)
suddenly noticed that the man was slowing sliding down his chair
and under the table, but the woman acted unconcerned.
The waitress watched as the man slid all the way down his
chair and out of sight under the table.
Still, the woman dining ...
1 Commentaires, 139 Consultations,
2 Votes
,3.81 Score
|
|
show me the money 16/1/2011
A couple was having a discussion about what to see and do
now that they were safely in Florida on their honeymoon.
Trying to assert himself rite off the bat, he exploded,
"If it weren't for my money, we wouldn't
be here at all!" The wife replied, "My dear,
if it weren't for your money, not only would we not be
in Florida, we wouldn't be on a honeymoon, nor would
there be any "we" in the first ...
1 Commentaires, 107 Consultations,
1 Votes
,2.40 Score
|
|
first time swallowing 8/1/2011
ill never forget the time i had this hot girl swallow for
me. the look on her face was priceless. so innocent but so
confused LOL.
0 Commentaires, 181 Consultations,
0 Votes
|
